Learning as I Go

I have no idea

What I am doing here

All I know is that I am not going back

To how it used to be

~

The old life that pained me

The dreams that wouldn’t let me sleep

The emptiness that couldn’t be filled

I will not go back!

~

The darkness enveloped me

Cocooned me and transformed me into… this

I am a shadow of my former self, no longer naïve

I echo now in my hollowness!

~

I almost drown in the nothingness

Kicking and screaming until I had nothing left

I had no escape, and no hope for rescue

I didn’t even trust myself to help

~

Once you have known the numbness

It finds you again at will

Your escape is temporary and won’t last long

The mind will imprison you in your own doubt and fear

~

I will not go back to that

My voice has value, no more empty screams

I will share my light with all

And hope it wont turn back off