Knowing My Enemy

"Hey Little Me. It's great to see you again!"

"Hey Big Me! How have things been?"

"You should have a seat; there's much to discuss."

"Uh-oh, this sounds pretty serious."

"It isn't rosy; I won't sugarcoat it for you."

"Oh no! What did I do?"

"It's not you; it's what I did.

It's not your fault. You're just a kid.

You had to grow up way too soon.

Stunted because you had no room

I did a lot you said you never would.

Convinced myself being bad made me feel good

I made the impossible a reality.

Turned over every stone placed in front of me

Most I should have left untouched, left alone

The path they led me on took me far from home.

I tried to fit us into a society that only had one mold.

But I didn't realize the price of admission would be your soul

I couldn't handle our pain, so I tried to heal us in ways that only hurt us more.

Walked over all the pieces of us I shredded on the floor

Treaded until I could hardly recognize your face

Allowed others to steal our peace and fill your space

I betrayed us and found myself lost.

Spiraled further, not understanding the costs

Now I sit with only recollections

Fighting hard to find reconnections

With myself, with you and the others

Because there's still so much with us all I have to discover

I should have been kinder to you, should have been your best friend.

I looked for you in those outside instead of looking within.

I let us collect dust on the highest shelf.

I looked for love from everyone else that I should have given you myself."