It hurts to say

It hurts to say

Amen.

I know it

is part of the ritual

it is what is expected

you say 'bless you'

Amen.

You say 'we thank God'

I must say

Amen.

For my light to stay shining

lest you turn a blind eye

to the love I offer.

I must say it in case

you find me wanting

in my knowledge of

the word.

My words will not do.

They must wear the dress of the composer

the calligraphy of the writer

the scriptures of the mighty

the vote of the masses

but they must not

no - not ever - be naked.

Amen.

It hurts to say Amen

when, uttered in the doubt

of my decisions

I fail to tell you that

in the dark, with no dress

no composer

no mask I;

am void.

So how do I ask for

freedom when freedom chains me?

I cannot say Amen

because I never know

the serenity of what I ask.

Amen.