Inside-Outside

Outside she’s smiling.

Inside she’s crying.

Outside she’s laughing.

Inside she’s angry.

Outside she’s calm, peaceful.

Inside she’s screaming.

She opens her mouth to speak, but the fears inside do not translate as they come out.

Instead she says, “I’m ok.”

Inside she says, “I’m a mess.”

As the day goes on and one after another people need things from her, she helps, pouring pieces of herself into things. Pieces of herself, inside she cannot spare.

She’s worked hard to be ok, to keep the darkness at bay.

She tries to focus on the good in her life.

But the more she gives and the less she gets back, the harder it is to see any good.

When the clouds move in they cover and weigh her down. Making it harder for the inside to stay there.

Her smile falters.

Her laugh is weak.

Beneath the calm is a jittery leg, or fingers being wrung.

Inside she’s screaming for help.

Outside she hides away from it.

Then when it all becomes too much he reaches out, with a light touch.

He knows she’s fighting a battle she can’t do alone.

He creates a place of safety, letting her cry, scream, shake, everything she needs.

Outside she’s crying.

Inside she’s healing.

Outside she’s speaking her fears, frustrations, her dark thoughts.

Inside she’s being filled with safety, with compassion with protection.

Outside she’s calm, smiling, positive.

Inside she’s loved.