Imperfection

If I could take it back,

Every thing I said,

and

Everything you thought you

Heard, I would.

And this

is what I’d say to you

“I think of you often

and it softens nothing.

When you walked away,

It broke my heart

that is the truth of this.

I long for the laughter, your concern.

Yearning to hear your voice

never lost a friend before.

Sadder than actual death,

you walking around

Right in front of me

But not feeling blessed to be

In my company

I suppose

I never meant to hurt you

and now I’m seeking resolution.

Among all that confusion,

I didn’t have the courage to say

I apologize.

you didn’t give me the opportunity

to decide what

kind of fool i was going

to be.

You decided for me.

and you can be so cruel.

My armor has holes.

I struggle with vulnerability.

I lack the ability to

Heal in the speed of light

You know that though

Under your thumb

I build walls higher

Than babble could extend

But,

I want to listen.

I know you felt it.

But I am not sure

What I want to hear

Tell me anyway

Let me decipher your

Defense codes

And let us slip into modes

Of forgiveness

I am a witness to what

Good we can create.

I did my best

My character is sinuous

But, I didn’t try to deceive you

And you….,

didn’t tell me the truth.

So I struck back with venom

My choices gone

Cause you let them slip away into

Your fairytales of harm and

Untimely circumstance.

And as I released a sigh of regret

For my adverse reactions,

I missed you and all

The passion of our experience.

So I ask that you

deliver me from

your indifference.

Please.