I Remember

In hindsight, you've always been the one.

In my mind, you're standing there, brown eyes shining,

Smiling, beneath the sun.

~

Looking back, I wonder what the future could've foretold

Had we simply taken a leap of faith and put our trust into the unknown.

Instead, we were left to wonder, each of us separately alone.

~

In hindsight, maybe we should've just given this our all.

We shouldn't have shied away from our hearts' true call.

I wish that you'd never let go of me,

That I'd had the courage to just love boldly.

~

But let's not get ahead of ourselves.

Allow me to rewind,

Refresh your mind.

Let's take a journey back in time.

~

Back to that pivotal day...

Exiting the train in the waning twilight

I thought I was merely about to host that night,

An entertaining evening,

For friends both old and new.

~

As you know, the best of plans just lie in vain,

Sometimes, there's nothing one can do.

We were booked solid,

Capacity full, not a vacancy in the venue.

I entered the room, and I can't explain,

Suddenly there was only you.

~

I'd tasked myself with a job,

And knew I needed to see it through.

Although I could barely concentrate,

My mind was so focused on you.

~

I certainly didn't anticipate that my heart would go careening,

No, not on the night of that fateful screening.

Well, that was before my gaze had lit upon you.

My heart landed squarely at your feet.

It fluttered softly. It skipped a beat.

~

Emotions began surging,

Our minds were effortlessly merging,

Two red dots converging there upon their screens.

Those days were impactful,

Causing ripples yet to be still.

That week is one in which my heart has oft' ventured

And tried to seek her fill.

~

No, it wasn't perfect.

Yet it was oh so worth it.

Though there was still much left unsaid.

All these words were swirling, trapped inside my head.

~

I ensconced it all inside a crystalline bubble,

Held it close long after I thought our time had passed.

Rippling in eternity, beneath our fervor's caress.

Would I ever again feel the touch of your hand?

Or your lips' sweet finesse?

~

Sorry, I know, I mustn't digress...

Although no one would have ever guessed

At just how precipitous our first meeting would be.

~

We'd been virtual "friends" for quite some time.

See you and me, we had met online.

I'm not sure which of us initially picked,

And who had only to hit "Accept" with a click.

~

But the moment we were face to face,

My heart sighed and began to race.

Yours had issued an instant reply.

The twinkle in your eyes hinted at more than your words would imply.

There was a deeper connection,

Far beyond that of any virtual selection.

~

To anyone observing us,

You'd think we were long lost.

Lovers or friends?

No one could be sure.

That's how it remained for us,

It was just oh so much more.

~

Our energy was an unnameable cure,

There was an inexplicable shift inside,

Like being swept along by the sun-kissed tide,

Yet it steadied me right to my very core.

Keeping me, always, parallel to the shore.

~

I kept our flame simmering within my heart.

Ever fearful we'd end before we could really start.

Little did I know, that those doubts had no place.

Not when one sexy grin upon your face,

Could cause my heart to stop, gallop and race.

~

For an instant, I dove right in!

Threw all caution to the wind.

While it lasted, expectations were transcended.

Sadly, the timing...It just wasn't right.

Still, I've always treasured that enchanted night.

~

My mind drifts back to that very first kiss...

You spoke with that deep southern drawl,

Your former life couldn't be detected in that smoky voice, at all.

Your timbre has always turned my knees to mush,

It was always so much more than the simplicity of a mere crush.

~

I pulled you in close, with your shirt gripped tightly in my fist.

Your lips were more than I could possibly resist.

You emboldened my spirit, the world felt so right.

Tangled in one another's arms, we hung on all night,

Until the arrival of the wee morning light.

~

Faint dawn was peeking through our blinds.

When you took my hand in yours and lead me out the door.

Saying, "Close your eyes. Just trust me!"

"Where are we going? I can smell the sea, feel the sand."

"I've got you. Just hold my hand...

Now open your eyes."

~

Standing there, we watched the mauve wisped mandarin sunrise.

Although, I was mostly lost in your eyes.

We sat and talked for hours,

The world, a distant focus,

Indistinct and abstract.

~

Our whole world existed inside those moments,

Shining in the sun.

I'd believed we'd become so much more,

Back then, and certainly by now.

~

We could see the storms were rolling in,

Although they still seemed a far-off malady.

Hand in hand, we'd sprinted down the beach.

~

Thunder boomed, lightning sizzled,

We thought we were safely out of reach.

In a blink, the rain came pouring down,

Pitter-patter,

Then, an onslaught,

Raindrops dripping upon our crowns.

Suddenly the winds were howling, the storm was all around.

~

Our moment was swept away as thoroughly as my heart.

All we had was a brief, blinding blaze.

Would we end before we could ever really start?

Soon our trip was over and it was time for us to re-appraise, with the miles of distance in between,

We knew we'd have no choice

But to communicate, each behind a screen.

~

Vowing to fit in every text or phone call.

Both of us digging in our heels,

Trying to delay our fall.

Every midnight chat

We spoke about everything,

Hopes, dreams, fears. This and that.

~

Days turned to weeks, months to years.

We were there for one another no matter the cost.

Always able to lean if the other was feeling lost.

Replacing sorrows with joy-filled tears.

~

Desires pushed to the wayside,

Our connection remained undefined.

While my heart? Well, it was always resigned.

These feelings have stood the ultimate test of time.

~

Then, unexpectedly, my world came crashing to a halt.

You were one of the few on whom I could depend.

A true friend.

No. So much more.

~

When I had needed you, you lifted me up

You were the one who had filled my proverbial cup.

I'll never forget

How you'd always been watching,

Rooting from afar.

~

It's true.

The timing, still just wasn't right.

Although the feelings always were.

For my peace of mind, I just needed to be sure,

And you were always my undeniable lure.

~

Then, without warning something shifted

Our bubble? It was popped and suddenly lifted.

In a blink, you wound up with a crazy bat.

~

We all saw you going down,

I wanted to pull you back from the brink.

She would be the one to drag you under,

Kill your spirit, make you sink.

~

She, a siren in her own tumultuous sea.

She made it impossible for us to chat.

Fully knowing that for you, I'd always willingly go to bat.

~

She was determined to come between you and me.

Our communication became shuttered,

Until we were hushed down to only the occasional sputter.

~

Still, I rooted for you from afar,

Trying to extend a life raft, but you couldn't see the flares,

She was gagging you with her red flags.

Pulling you inexorably down,

Down,

Until you'd nearly drowned.

~

I wanted to scream aloud,

Shake you into consciousness.

Wanted you to reclaim your crown.

For you to awaken, and finally take a look around.

~

How I wish we'd discover all of it had been nothing more than a nightmarish dream.

But you still weren't ready, or so it would seem.

So, I wished from afar,

Never quite ready to say au revoir.

~

Our lives diverged and they drifted apart,

Yet I still looked to the night sky,

So clearly remembering our start.

~

We stood under these stars, surrounded by artificial lights,

They flickered and flashed.

It made for quite the sight,

But the safety I felt with you by my side?

That is something that can never ever be denied.

~

Standing upon that rocky shore, warm storm-spiraling waves urging us ever closer.

It had all felt within reach.

The last thing I expected was any sort of breach.

~

What my heart felt was a love so pure.

I guess I just thought that in the end,

It would ultimately be our long-sought cure.

~

Now it's several years after the storms have all cleared,

Just sitting here when your name appeared,

Your face upon my screen.

Suddenly, vanishing, all the years in between.

~

The butterflies in my stomach, at once as rambunctious as that of a teen.

In an instant we are back on that rocky shore, the sun beating down, storm rolling in.

~

I'm back in your arms,

My back against the wind.

Your heart beating against mine.

I'm trying not to take it all as a sign.

~

Then, three dots blink within the screen's soft glow.

"If time could be re-wound,

Where would we be?

Would you have stayed here?

Would you be with me?"

~

"After we'd found,

A love unlike any other?

Instead, not surrendered, but vowed to one another?"

~

"I want to believe

That we can still do this.

I need to return to that moment on the sand,

When I took you by the hand,

The feel of your kiss still lingering upon my lips.

The curve of your hip beneath my fingertips."

~

"So, are you in this for the long haul?"

"You know, on some level, I think we have been since that very first call.

If you'd have listened back then,

I'd asked you to trust in the fall.

Don't you remember?"

"Oh, I remember it all."

~

"Before more grains are lost in the sieve of time.

Will you come back to me?

Can we just be this time?

The years have done their damage,

But it's still you, and always will be."

~

"Although I want to believe that this time

You'll always be mine.

That maybe we could be, a love everlasting.

A love for all time.

~

Yet so much has come to pass,

And this bond has far surpassed.

We've managed to make it last.

We've lived through it all,

Survived every crash,

Every insubstantial fall.

Is it finally time to answer my heart's one true call?"

"Let's give it our all!"

~

Now, you're standing beside me,

The sunshine reflecting down upon the sea,

Hand in hand, our hearts as one.

~

You and me,

We've finally pledged to be,

Together, Forever.

We're for all of eternity.

~

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