I Miss Being Afraid

I remember being afraid of entering every room

Turning every corner

Not looking back enough

Looking too much

Closing my eyes

Afraid the things in my head were there

Waiting for me

Watching me

Following me

Wanting to get me

Grab me

And take me.

I miss being afraid

And being able to escape my fears

Back when

I could turn the light on and see nothing there

When I could rush back home before being caught

When I could look long enough and find nothing there.

Now I'm never afraid

To see any monsters or demons waiting for me

I no longer imagine anything wanting to get me.

But it's because

They've already taken me

They no longer need to wait for me

I no longer need to be wary of them

That's why the only thing I fear is looking in the mirror

And seeing the same face everyday

Seeing

My soul

Staring into eyes that are no longer mine

Speaking through them

Begging to be set free

These hands touch this face

But the soul feels nothing

I wonder what I am

I exist in limbo

Because I am not my soul

And this body is only a vessel

Trapping my soul inside

I wonder what is my purpose

Is it to free my soul?

And put this possessed body to rest?