I Couldn’t Say Out Loud

I couldn't say out loud …

How the very sight of you

Took my breath away

I couldn’t say out loud …

How being near you

Made my heart race too

I couldn’t say out loud …

How the sound of your voice

Is better than any musical choice

I couldn’t say out loud …

How all I wanted was to hold you in my arms

Spend my very life keeping you safe from all harms

How your laughter made my blood boil

How your love was my soul’s fertile soil

I couldn’t say out loud …

How cuddling next to you for a show

Meant more to me than you’ll ever know

How lying next to you as you snore

Was a feeling I truly, wholly adore

How seeing you sleepy-eyed patter to the kitchen

Was as fun as watching a playful gamboling kitten

I couldn’t say out loud …

How whenever your face would frown

I’d want to make you laugh by acting the clown

How seeing your emerald eyes light when I brought you flowers

Made me pity other men who, without you, must be dour

I couldn’t say out loud …

How the day you said yes to my proposal

Left me speechless.. nonvocal

How when we stood on that altar

My heart bursting, knowing I couldn’t falter

All my every dream came true

How to keep you the very heavens I’d sue

I couldn’t say out loud …

How every subsequent day

Your love made a joy in every way

How to touch you, stroke you, be intimate

Was a feeling beyond human sentiment

….

I couldn’t’ say … I had not the words

…

When you became ill

I prayed for a miracle

But still I couldn’t say …

I couldn’t say out loud …

How bleak my tomorrows would be

If you were not there for my eyes to see

I couldn’t say …

Goodbye

I wouldn’t …

Instead, inside I cry

Now I kneel here, flowers in hand

As salty tears fall upon sand

So now must I say …

Out loud. …

How empty my soul feels

How life no longer holds thrills

How ice runs down my spine… Bringing chills

Now I can say out loud. …

You were my everything