How Can I Miss You?

How can I miss you?

When you never loved me at all?

I don’t want to know you

Or remember us, AT ALL.

This pain pulls me asunder, whether day or mid-night.

I no longer wish for my heart to recall

The memories of the one who would cause such pain to befall.

.

The ache, now unceasing,

My stomach, how it churns

Can’t wager a guess as to how many times I’ve tossed and I’ve turned

This relationship of ours was not one of the norm,

My pain unlike those of whom you’d only slightly burned.

For it was my own sense of self that you so deviously overturned.

.

I’m at sea right now, drowning in the storm.

You claimed you were my anchor,

But all you did was drag me down.

My hope, dreams, and health, all dashed away in an instant.

I toss among these sheets, my mind consumed by my blunder.

.

My love for you was a world’s greatest wonder.

Now I can’t tell which way is up, you’re all I can remember.

If only I could go back, my heart would still beat on.

I’d never surrender, my love from you would be withheld.

Your toxic presence gone,

My world would be righted, no longer in your control.

Free once and for all from your unceasing vitriol.

. . .

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This poem was originally published on Medium: