Healing Her Heart

Larissa slid behind the wheel of her car, intending to attend Sunday morning

church services. However using her right foot to drive proved nearly impossible.

After several jerky attempts at driving with her left foot, she let out a frustrated

groan, turned off the car, and awkwardly climbed back out from behind the

wheel. No way was that going to work. She was more likely to hit something

than not.

She stared up at the cloudless sky, fighting a wave of helplessness. This stupid

ankle was going to ruin her few days off work if she couldn’t manage to drive a

car. She propped herself against the vehicle, enjoying the cool breeze as she tried

to figure out what to do next.

Less than one day and she was already heartily sick of being stuck in her

apartment. Maybe she could manage to hobble down to Rose’s Café? Josie

would keep her company at least for a while. There was nothing the café owner

liked more than gossip.

“Larissa!”

She turned when she heard her name, surprise widening her eyes when she

caught sight of Gabe Allen walking toward her. He’d parked his car a few spaces

down from hers.

“Hi, Gabe.” She was glad that this time she didn’t smell like sweat and was

dressed in a flowery skirt and a matching pink, short-sleeved top. She tried not to

fidget with her clothing. “What are you doing here?”

“I brought over a pair of crutches in case you needed some help getting

around.” He gazed at her attire and lifted his brow. “Are you headed somewhere

special?”

She blushed and wished she could stop this ridiculous reaction to him. “I

planned on attending church services, but driving is apparently not an option.”

Had he mentioned crutches? She brightened with the possibility. “I bet I could

walk to church, though, if you’re serious about allowing me to borrow those

crutches.” Church and then Rose’s café. Much better than sitting around and

staring at the four walls of her apartment.

“I think it would be better if I drove you to church,” Gabe said slowly.

“Crutch walking isn’t easy for long distances.”

“Oh.” She was flabbergasted by his willingness to take her to church because

she’d never seen him attend services in the past. “That’s very kind, but I don’t

want to take you out of your way.”

“It’s no problem. Here, lean on me, and we’ll get you over to my car.”

She found it unsettling to realize she was standing close to Gabe with his arm

anchored around her waist for the second time in less than twenty-four hours.

She had no idea why God kept sending this man into her path, but for right now,

she couldn’t think of an excuse not to go along with his offer. Other than the

obvious one, that spending time with Gabe wasn’t smart.

But she breathed a little easier when she was safely seated in the passenger

seat of his car. She waited until he slid into the driver’s seat before glancing at

him. “You know, I wouldn’t mind if you dropped me off at church and came

back in an hour if you don’t want to go in with me.”

Gabe looked past her, over his shoulder as he backed out of the parking space.

“Is that a polite way of saying I’m not welcome?” he asked.

“No! Of course not.” She was horrified that he would think that. “I guess I

just never noticed you attending church services before.”

A smile bloomed across his features. “Isn’t it the job of a good Christian to

convince us non-goers to attend church and to rediscover our faith?” he asked in

a teasing tone. “At least that’s what my sister always tries to do.”

She relaxed after hearing his sister was a Christian. “Yes, you’re right about

that. I would love for you to come to church, but I can’t force you to believe in

God. You have to come to that realization on your own.”

Gabe was silent for a moment. “I have to be honest with you. I haven’t been

to church in well over a year.”

She wondered what had happened to cause his lapse in faith. And given what

he’d just told her, she had no idea why he’d even offered to come with her in the

first place. But she didn’t want to pry into his personal life by asking. She, better

than anyone, understood the need for privacy. “Well, I have to tell you that out of

all the church services I’ve attended in my lifetime, Pastor John gives one of the

best,” she said lightly. “He’s down to earth and yet always helps remind us what

God would want us to do. Maybe I’m being presumptuous, but I think you’ll like

him.”

Gabe made a noncommittal noise but didn’t say anything more as he pulled

up to the parking lot of the church. She struggled to get out of the car, which

wasn’t easy, but within moments, Gabe was there, helping her.

“Thanks,” she murmured, hoping he wouldn’t notice the breathlessness in her

tone.

“Stay there,” he told her. “I’ll get the crutches.”

He pulled the aluminum crutches out of the backseat and set them next to her.

“Try these. I set them up for your height based on memory, but I might have the

measurements wrong.”

She took the crutches and propped them beneath her armpits, not surprised to

discover they were perfect. “They’re great. Thanks so much.”

“I broke my foot once, so trust me, I know what you’re going through,” he

confided. “It’s not as easy to crutch walk as it looks.”

She flashed him a smile and made her way over toward the sidewalk leading

up to the front door of the church. Gabe stayed right beside her, his hand

hovering on the small of her back, as if he was worried she might fall.

There weren’t many parishioners in attendance as it was the holiday, but those

who were there greeted her by name. She didn’t know if she should introduce

Gabe, and if so, as what? Her friend? A colleague? One of the doctors she

worked with? She couldn’t bring herself to use any of those options, so she

decided not to say anything at all.

Gabe was likely regretting his offer to bring her, based on the knowing looks

being flashed their way. Did Gabe realize the power of small-town gossip? She

could feel her cheeks turning red and ducked her head, hoping no one would

notice.

She told herself not to worry what anyone else thought. If this was what Gabe

needed to bring him back to the church, then the minor discomfort was well

worth it.

Closing her eyes, she sent up a small prayer. Please, Lord, show Gabe the way

home.

____________

Gabe stood beside Larissa in church, wondering why on earth he’d agreed to

this. She’d given him an out, had offered to be dropped off and picked up in an

hour when the service was over. Honestly, that was exactly what he’d considered

before she mentioned it.

But he hadn’t taken the chance to skip out. Instead, here he was, attending

church in the first time in over a year. His sister had dragged him to services

whenever possible back in Madison, but after moving to Crystal Lake, he hadn’t

bothered.

When Larissa had mentioned that she couldn’t force him to believe in God,

he’d relaxed his guard. He loved his sister, Kimberly, but she was constantly

preaching at him, trying to get him to buy into every one of her beliefs.

Instinctively, the more she pushed, the more he’d backed off.

He picked up the hymnal and found the opening hymn. One thing he’d rather

liked about the church services was the music. It occurred to him now just how

much he’d missed it.

As the organist began to play, they rose to their feet and began to sing along.

His baritone was a bit rusty, but he soon got into the rhythm.

He caught Larissa’s pleased smile as she joined him in singing along. Her arm

lightly brushed his, and he kept his eyes centered on the hymnal, pretending not

to notice.

Even though he did.

The pastor was younger than he’d anticipated. Gabe hadn’t expected to enjoy

the service, despite Larissa’s glowing praise of Pastor John Gorman, but since

the theme of the sermon today was forgiveness, he found his attention riveted on

the pastor’s words.

Pastor John paused for a moment and then read, “And whenever you stand

praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in

heaven may also forgive you your trespasses (Mark 11:25).”

The passage struck a chord deep within. He’d remained so angry with

Rebecca after the way she’d destroyed his reputation at the University Hospital

in Madison. Telling his boss and the hospital leadership that he’d sexually

harassed her when, in fact, she was simply upset because he’d broken off their

relationship. She’d cost him his job. No matter how much he’d tried to deny her

allegations, he knew there was no way to recover from the stigma.

It was her word against his, and he’d lost. Big time.

Shaking off the past, he focused on the pastor’s sermon. According to Pastor

John, if he wanted to find peace, he first had to cleanse his soul. And that meant

forgiving Rebecca.

Could he really do that? He knew he should, but saying and doing were two

different things.

The organist began the closing hymn before he’d even realized the service

was nearly over. And he was even more surprised that he hadn’t been watching

the clock, the way he used to. In fact, he’d enjoyed the service.

“Thanks for bringing me, Gabe,” Larissa said softly. “That was exactly what I

needed this morning.”

“My pleasure,” he responded. “Don’t tell my sister, but I liked it, too.”

She laughed, and the sound reminded him of picnics at the beach. Or maybe

that was just the last time he could remember being happy. Odd that he felt more

lighthearted and relaxed around Larissa.

“How would you like to go out on my boat this afternoon?” he offered. “I

know the lake will be busy considering it’s the Memorial Day holiday, but we

can still have fun.”

Her blue eyes glowed with excitement and surprise. “Oh, I’d love to do that.

You have no idea how horrible it is sitting inside the apartment while everyone

else is out having a good time.”

“Great. How about we grab some lunch and then head over to my place.

Unless you need to go home first for some reason?”

“No, I’m fine.” She blushed. “And I was thinking of stopping at Rose’s Café,

anyway.”

“Rose’s Café it is.” He was glad she’d agreed to come with him, even though

he wasn’t exactly sure why he’d brought the idea up in the first place.

Nothing had changed. Larissa was still a nurse at Hope County Hospital, and

he was still vying for the medical director position. He couldn’t afford to get

emotionally involved with someone he worked with. Yet he could relate to

where she was coming from. Sitting at home alone didn’t hold a lot of appeal for

him, either.

He would just have to make sure that spending the day with Larissa was about

being friends and nothing more.

____________

Larissa told herself that being out on Gabe’s boat didn’t mean anything. Even

though Josie had wagged her eyebrows when she’d noticed Larissa and Gabe

together. Larissa tipped her face to the sun and tried to calm her racing heart.

Maybe this wasn’t the best idea she’d ever had.

So why had she said yes?

The logical answer was that she’d been bored and hadn’t wanted to sit around

in her apartment. But the real reason was that she liked Gabe. As a person, not

just as a physician she worked with.

And she hadn’t liked a man in a really long time.

For the first time, she realized that she’d been running away from her past. As

much as she learned to love Crystal Lake, the fact of the matter was that she

would have worked anywhere that wasn’t Chicago Central.

Gabe wasn’t Rolland. She’d made one bad decision, but did she have to live

with that one bad decision forever? Maybe it was time to forgive herself. Wasn’t

that what Pastor John had suggested?

“I brought you here to relax, not to be stressed out,” Gabe said as he slowed

the boat, banking gently around a curve.

She hadn’t realized that her distress had been so evident and cleared her

features. “Sorry about that. I guess I was wallowing in the past. You’re right that

being out on the water like this is very relaxing. You must come out here

whenever you have a day off, weather permitting.”

“I don’t come out often enough,” he admitted. “I tend to lose myself in

running instead.”

She grinned. “Yes, I know.”

He was silent for a long moment. “I’ve been working hard to let go of the past

as well,” he finally said. “So I understand how it can creep up on you at the

worst time.”

She lifted a brow, surprised he’d admitted that much. “We should be able to

let go, right? Considering how nice and peaceful it is here.”

He nodded as he glanced around. “Yeah, nothing like the city, that’s for sure.”

He lifted his brow. “It’s a bit ironic that we’re both relatively new to the area.”

She remembered her first few weeks here and suppressed a shudder. “At least

you were a Wisconsinite.” She’d heard he’d moved here from Madison. “I came

from Chicago, and let me tell you, that was a huge hurdle to overcome.”

He laughed. “I can only imagine.”

She smiled in spite of herself. “Thankfully, Julie Crain befriended me, and

since she grew up here, the locals finally stopped treating me like an outsider.”

Julie was working this weekend or she would have had someone to hang out

with.

Someone other than Gabe Allen.

Not that she was complaining or anything.

“I bet if we asked around, we’d find more transplant residents than those who

were born here,” Gabe confided.

The thought of people who were born and raised here made her think of poor

Annie Hinkle. According to Julie, the Hinkles had been here as long as she had.

Her smile faded. “You might be right,” she agreed.

Her cell phone rang, surprising her. She stared at the screen for a moment,

tempted to let the call go to voice mail as she didn’t recognize the number.

Reluctant curiosity compelled her to press the green button to answer. “Hello?”

“Larissa? It’s me, Annie.” The woman was speaking so softly she could

barely hear her.

A shiver of apprehension rippled down her spine. “Annie? What’s wrong? Are

you okay?”

There was a loud crash followed by nothing but silence.

Annie had hung up.