He makes me feel
My novel The Half Paper Moon is now available through Golden Storyline Books!!!
How can he even look at me?
So close.
So near.
I feel his breath beating down on me.
I feel his pulse racing in my mouth.
His golden hued gray mirrors reflecting such heavy pools, and I sink into them.
****
Why does he make me feel,
I don’t want to feel.
****
I am not here; but you make me feel the present.
Right here and now.
I touch your arm in court,
You let me keep my hand there.
I admitted to murder,
Yet you show me empathy.
My mind is cracked, my heart is burnt
And still, you try to seek out my humanity.
You make me feel like I could have
Something real,
Something sweet,
Something else unlike what I had before.
How can you even look at me, Edward?
I can barely look at myself.
You asked me to write to you,
So I did.
I’m a murderer but here I am,
Trying to stop thinking of you,
And your highly impassioned speech to save me,
When all I want to tell you is no matter what happens now
Even if they kill me, too,
All I
Want
You
To know
Is,
You saved me anyway.
(I could never feel, even as a child I was forced to pretend I had no feelings at all)
But, you,
made me feel,
And that’s more real to me than my whole life.
~~~~~~~
The Half Paper Moon is NOW available on Golden Storyline Books! The Kindle is available now on Amazon! The paperback will be here soon as well.
Author note: Here is a throwback to an earlier published poem(this one lol)!! The piece is about my characters Edward and John in my published novel The Half Paper Moon. It is in John’s perspective, the one on trial for murder. Edward is his defense lawyer. I hope you enjoyed it!! Please check out my book today!
About the Creator
Melissa Ingoldsby
I am a published author on Patheos,
I am Bexley by Resurgence Novels
The Half Paper Moon on Golden Storyline Books for Kindle.
My novella The Job and Atonement will be published this year by JMS Books
Keep reading
More stories from Melissa Ingoldsby and writers in Poets and other communities.
Comments (6)
Awesome!!! Loving it!!💕❤️❤️
Well-wrought! Though context is quite different, I have a rare hard copy of Lionel Dahmer's book about the heartbreak his son caused, and his attempt to grapple with Jeffrey's actions by examining his life. It's been a while since I read it, but your poem made me think of it. When asked by an interrogator, "Do you feel love?" Jeffrey Dahmer said, "No, I don't think someone who feels love could do that." But I wonder, all things considered, if that's what he would prefer to believe about himself. He was afraid of being abandoned, so he must have felt something like love for those things he did not want to let go. Dunno. Food for thought. Sorry for the ramble!
I saw the title and immediately thought "Hey didn't Merly already have a poem with this title?" Then I started reading and realised that it indeed was that same poem! I enjoyed the reread! Love Edward and John!
Love the mysterious excerpt! Well done!
Congratulations, Melissa! My only concern is when will I find the time to read it.
Well done!