Haven.

A fantasy kingdom, a place far away

A dream, an adventure, an escape from today

A sanctuary, were misfits can play...

You can't see it at first; it's dutifully hidden

The room of requirement, for our eyes alone

Whisper the password, and slip in the moment

the outsiders turn their head to the unknown.

It's vibrant, it's mystical, there's light everywhere

Colours you'd never seen before, and look, over there!

The fae ask your name, you give them your dead one

They take it and send it downstream, forgotten

Weight off your shoulders is lifted; it's finally begun

You're ready to take the path rarely trodden

The river is alive, the blues reel you in

In no time at all you don't know where you've been

Swimming with sirens far out at sea

Songs referring to you like you've always wanted to be

Suddenly self-conscious, silent, you shiver

Why did you ever set foot in that river?

You look down and see a body that isn't your own

You look up and wait for the deep blues to swallow you whole.

A breath of fresh air, pink scales beneath you

Lifting you above the perilous waves

Hippocampi attempting to save you

Seaweed tied tightly around the parts that you hate.

They leap, they soar, and you soar with them

Leading the charge from your spot on their back

Your noble chariot has managed to awaken

The confidence you thought that you'd always lack.

Euphoria, paradise, you arrive at your oasis

On the shore waiting are elves dressed in white

Their purity and regality is the basis

Of the strong, hidden kingdom, where you could feel right

They welcome you with open arms, dress you in white cloth

"No preconceptions nor gender, we don you in troth,"

Free of the burdens you left far behind you

You don't even feel like anything was lost.

"I'm me! I'm free! I'm who I want to be!"

The elves cheer with you, whinnying hippocampi

The sirens in the distance sing songs of your name

Of the lengths you travelled, of dysphoria overcame

Their scales are a gift, your loyal steed add their own

You add them to your formless ivory gown

"That is the flag of our kingdom, young squire,"

"Welcome, my liege, to the Hidden Empire."

You hold your head high, you remember your worth

When you're finally ready, you return to your place of birth

New name, new body, new frame of mind

"Now I can set out in the real world and make it mine."

Author's notes: Hi! Thank you for reading my extremely personal poem - I'd like to explain it a little. In my other entries, I used colour to describe people and feelings to fit the theme of this colour-based-poem challenge, but for this one I wanted to interpret the prompt differently and make it more explicitly about gender identity as a trans person. If you aren't aware, the colours described in the story - blue, pink, and white, are the colours of the trans pride flag!

In case it wasn't clear, the experience this poem describes is that of a young trans person discovering the trans community - it's hidden, tucked away from the societal norm, at least in most places. It's not something you really see or find out about without looking, but for a trans person it's essential to our journey of self-discovery. Finding other people who are like us, who understand us, is literally life-changing; it's empowering, knowing that we exist out here and we're still fighting.

It's hard. Figuring out you're transgender is hard enough as it is, but then comes the waves of dysphoria that keep interrupting your progress in your self-love journey. But peer support and gender-affirming clothes and binders and those sorts of things help wonders, so I wanted to highlight that; yes, finding the trans community is a huge weight off your shoulders, but that's not the end of the struggle, you know?

I'm not sure if you'd count white as a colour. I do, for this poem anyway, and I wanted to point out it's meaning on the trans flag - it represents people who don't conform to gender as a construct. I liked the idea of making it mean a clean slate, so I put the genderless elves donning the main character in white almost to cleanse them of their birth gender and start fresh to live their truth. (Or 'troth.')

The ending is a bit of a manifestation. Post-transition, feeling good about yourself and ready to take on the world! The exact kind of energy I want to harness this upcoming Pride Month.

This has gotten longer than the actual poem, whoops - but nevertheless, I thank you again for sticking with me. I hope this poem resonated with something within you, either as a kindred spirit or an ally.

Stay proud.