I look you in the eye
Write your name
With my shaky
Scarred hands
In a desperate attempt
To fit the key in the lock
To fling the cage door open
Because isn’t that how you
Escape your ghost?
You face them
❀
You look at the ground
Your reflection
Their faux reassurances
Anywhere but my face
Because isn’t that what
The guilty do?
❀
Admit it
I deserved more
Than you gave me
I deserved more than
Gaslighting and insanity
Eventual abandonment
And cruelly crafted
Unanswered questions
❀
You can paint your moods
A high vis happiness all you want
Wear it as a neon vest to prove a point
But you cannot escape the truth
You let me down in a way
I would’ve never done to you
You gave me the kind of brutal
Gaping, almost irreparable wound
I used to try and save you from
❀
You are the memories
I hide under my bed
Despite the way you make me bleed
You have no fangs or claws or horns
Just a face that is all too familiar
A face that used to look like safety
❀
I vomited up all my confidence
Labelled myself as unlovable
All because you gave up on me
❀
Yet sometimes
When I am trapped in
Rumination
I wonder
Do you place your remorse
In the same place I store
My lack of closure
The cage I can never break free of
❀
Do I haunt the space
Under your bed like
You fill mine?
❀
Yet here is the truth
I have buried my own key
Grown my own fangs
Clawed my own skin
I am my own cage
My own monster
❀
I have failed myself
More than even you
Have let me down
❀❀❀❀❀
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When Contradicting Images Reveal More Than Logic
I have a history of analyzing the utterly brilliant and soul-touching poetry of Mesh Toraskar. It seems I’m unable to read his poetry and move on with my life, as each line, each half-line, each word is so rich with imagery, references, concepts, et cetera, that it requires taking slow, quiet time to fully appreciate it all. He took quite a long break at the beginning of the year before returning in April with the stunner, “fresh terror to love.” He has published two more pieces since then, one poem and one Feast narrative, both of which I highly recommend. You’ll quickly deduce that I will recommend everything this man has written. Anyway, I promised to come back when words were no longer failing me and I did not. A lot has happened to me and it simply has not stopped, yet this is no excuse for being mute to the following beauty.
By Mackenzie Davis6 days ago in Writers
Comments (16)
"You can paint your moods A high vis happiness all you want Wear it as a neon vest to prove a point But you cannot escape the truth" UGH among so many wonderful lines, these stood out to me. Such a cool metaphor here and it rings true; the guilty assuage it by acting perfectly fine, better than fine. "Vomiting up confidence" is sending me into a while imagining. Confidence being an internal thing, that to vomit it up is to lose it. You don't say that, though. The image is much more violent, brings to mind the circumstances that lead to the vomiting. WOW. What a powerful poem, Poppy. I adore how the ending makes it come full circle, makes the reader wonder if the speaker could be talking to herself the whole time, or maybe in the first reading, it's another person and on a second reading, it's herself. How creative, to characterize an acceptance of someone else's harm on yourself as being worse than their actions. By letting it be true, you commit a worse crime, become a worse beast, than they. Sorry for the length, I just kept writing, lol.
There is so much about this I loved but.. I have buried my own key grown my own fangs clawed my own skin I am my own cage my own monster blew me away. Simply excellent Poppy
"Do I haunt the space under your bed like you fill mine?" sent a wild ripple through me. This poem made me feel the way I did as a child at the Principles' office, sitting in my unearned shame for showing bra straps at school while simultaneously beaming with raging defiance as my mother told another parent off for teaching their son it's ok to snap them.
Well-wrought! Unrequited love is the most painful thing I ever experienced. This despite having lost both my parents, and many other things besides. You captured the pain here so well. I wish I could say you captured it so well no one would ever have to go through it again. We'd all know better, because who would ever want someone else to feel the way Poppy described? But it doesnt't work that way and it never really stops hurting, at least for me. I learned to bear the weight until I was strong enough to shed it. Perseverence was worth the price of admission, but I cannot recommend it. However, if it creates diamonds from coal like this poem here, we have every reason to believe there is yet hope for us. You must be a hearty soul! Bless you!
Woahhh, stunning Poppy!!! There are so many lines I loved from this! “You let me down in a way I would’ve never done to you You gave me the kind of brutal Gaping, almost irreparable wound I used to try and save you from” & “Just a face that is all too familiar A face that used to look like safety”. I’ve been right there with that one, some people live as ghosts to us now because they aren’t who we once knew. This was killer, powerful stuff! 🤍
Holy smokes, Poppy! What an emotional piece this is. "I am my own cage, My own monster." WOW! It is remarkable how our emotional monsters haunt us and drive us to where we become our own prison. Fabulous writing!
"Because isn’t that how you / Escape your ghost? / You face them". What a way to start! You've made another wonderful poem here!!
Beautifully written… sounds like you both have monsters under your beds… Time to give them the boot!
Brutal. But you still have scope to make amends to yourself, too.
"A face that used to look like safety". They're just so good at putting on masks. The ending was so sad and it hit me so hard. Loved your take on this challenge!
Wow!!!!
Great work! Well done! ♥️💜💙❤️
There is such visceral pain & truth in this, Poppy. And yes, people can only hurt us emotionally & personally if we allow them to. But if we don't allow at least for such a possibility, how will we ever know love, compassion, kindness, or grace?
“You are the memories I hide under my bed” Oh hot damn! That really hit me where I live Poppy This was a beautiful, sad, touching poem. Everything about it was amazing but that was sure as heck my favourite part 🤩
Wow, Poppy. This is stunning, visceral, and beautifully raw. I adored, "Do you place your remorse / In the same place I store / My lack of closure" Just gorgeous. 💗
Powerful & brilliant!!! Love it!!!♥️♥️💕