The waning moon’s rise.
I lay empty and broken.
Another failure.
///
The waning moon’s new sun rises.
I lay empty and broken,
Another yelling, "Failures!"
///
The new sun rises.
Laying empty and I'm broke, empty but standing,
yelling, "Failures!" "I'm done now."
///
The new sun's rises bright light.
broken, empty but I stand above blank pages,
yelling, "I'm done now" "Should I jump?"
///
The new sun's shines bright light
I stand above blank over new pages,
yelling, "Should I jump?" "what've I done?"
///
The new sun shines bright.
I Stand over new wonders,
yelling, "I’ve done it"
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A/N
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About the Creator
Matthew Fromm
Full-time nerd, history enthusiast, and proprietor of random knowledge. The best way to find your perfect story is to write it yourself.
Here there be dragons, and knights, and castles, and quests for entities not wishing to be found.
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Comments (21)
Love the edits! Powerful means to express trying, failing, and carrying on
Great take on the subject and glad you made it and entered it in the challenge
This is so clever. Seeing the piece evolve, especially with the connotation with the meaning poem - Brilliant work!
The imagery of the waning moon is strong.
Awww, I love this!! I was trying to figure out why things were crossed out until I realized you were LITERALLY drafting over the "failures" before. This was genius!
Love how this progressed. Great job.
powerful words. You intellect of coping up failure with the right choice of words is amazing
Love this formatting! 🙏🤍🕊️✨
Whoaaaa! I absolutely love this format! From dark and depressed to bright and new! I love the transition from one stanza to another, the cancelled out words and the addition of new ones. It was a whole satisfying journey! Thank you so much for taking us on it!
Yep, this is the thought process. Eventually it all comes together regardless how many times a page is wrapped, erasers are rubbed down to the metal nub, and no matter how many pencils break their graphite. All is a process. Trust in the process.
This is really good Matthew. Did you come up with this idea?
Wow! This is so cool, super creative, and FUN to read! And incredibly inspiring, to boot. Great one, Matthew; loving the positivity here.
That was a great poem! I love the progression and how you showed it with the formatting
Love the visual here!!🤯❤️
I love how you show the process of transforming a piece from one draft to another and make that into a poem about turning failures into triumphs. It really puts everything into perspective. Well done.
WOW! Just wow! this is so awesome.
Excellent!!! So many trips to the drawing board in search of the right approach, the right words or at least the right ones for now. Well done!
Brilliant concept piece, skillfully worked. We surely feel the exaltation of that last line!
This is bloody brilliant, I love it. Print out and stick on the wall material.
Processing from "failure" to success. I know what you mean!
A brilliant evolution. Well done, Matthew!