Euphoria

I am coming and you are gorgeous -

a little drunk,

dressed up in stockings you think you can't pull off,

and a sudden euphoria takes over me-

Exhausted and beautiful, you said more things than I could have ever remembered but I wasn't even listening

I could look into everyone and see what was going on inside them - I looked at you and I didn't know

were you sad because I was going back to Los Angeles

were you sad because you thought I didn't like you

were you sad because they didn't have your favourite pasta.

You were perfect and I was leaving,

you moved like a feather, fragile and powerful

you made my weaknesses, bad thoughts, vanities and hunger

vanish. And that was only the first time I ever saw you.

I thought I made you up inside my head-

This morning's cigarette,

this morning's sweet regret blasts and shudders in me. When did love stop being rebellious?

I drive down the Californian coast,

ashamed of my sentimentality and

possible love.

Tonight I'll read books and remember our night together; how we rolled up the carpet

so we could dance.

I play it in my head like a movie and

you’re the star.