Erase The Picture- Pretty Girl Magick

Birth vessel's temporary insanity

Swift scissor snipping

Clips golden locks, curly ques

Hair, then, hair no more

Floored, the little one

All of three

Learns a harsh lesson in vanity

Reflections, these are Suzy Q's

But that's not her real name

She and I, one and the same

One girl forgotten

One carrying shame

*

She was the beholder

The owner of mirrored magick

Self-reflection, self-adoration

"Pretty girl, such a pretty girl"

Kisses blown back to her

From Suzy Q, the reflection

Her playmate

Encouraging wide-eyed wonder

Self appreciation

Magick in mindspace

Love for self first, to love others more

TRAP DOOR

Matriarch panicked

Perhaps a manic moment

Depreciated, threatened by a little one

Culturally conclusive

Maybe thought patterns, elusive

Either way

Pretty girl magick became no more

*

Suzy Q melted in the mirror

Leaving behind her friend

A girl, now carrying shame-

ME!!!

The former anonymous

Shooed, hushed, unspoken child

Alone to face the consequences

Maternal expectations

Idealized the "perfect little lady"

Meek, modest, mindful

Humble, withholding self-praise

Neither seen nor heard

Preferring a common daisy

Never to be a rose

Tripwire thought:

Erase the hair, erase the picture

Clip, clip, clip

Snip, snip, snip

Cut out conceited inclinations

Cast out the demon

Mold the child: neat, kept, and quiet

Pretty girl magick, now mirror cracks

Beveled in glass

Lost yet longed for by a lonely lass

*

Questions equaled back talk

Weary of repercussions

Of which we do not speak

A little girl instructed

Became self-destructive

Changing her narrative

"Ugly girl, ugly girl, I hate what I see"

Walking an emotional tightrope

Never with a safety net

No open arms to catch her falls

She smashed the picture

The image of pretty things

Glass slivers cut her spirit

Deeping the wound

Following her from

Childhood to adolescence

Adolescence to womanhood

Womanhood to motherhood

Molded mayhem

Never an Amen

*

Daughters, her daughters

The light of her daughters

Inspired

Restoration in self-perception-

A silent, long-held dream

A magickal remolding

Opposing the melancholy unfolding

Beauty lost in shards

Reshaped, refastened, reconnected

Piece by piece

A lost image will one day revive

Suzy Q and I

Will mend our bond

For she is me and I am her

Longing for pretty girl magick

Contrary, it has been tragic-

Traumatic

Of which we do not speak

Wreaks havoc, honoring hallowed space

This is the image, I know now

The one I must erase

***

Author's note:

This poem is based on a real personal childhood experience, one that still haunts me.

"The beautiful ones always smash the picture"- Prince