disillusionment

every passing day we spend

not saying what needs to be said

leads to further disillusionment

and id like to think ill be okay once the feeling sets

and ive made peace with all the regret

but i spent so much of my time imagining you up

building you up in my head

i have made it nearly impossible

to not get upset

when you dont behave as the version of you i created

twisting nothings into somethings

so fantastical

now it hardly seems conceivable

so here i am

working my way to an end again

filling in all the blanks of your deafening silence

im hoping to be proven wrong for once

because despite my callous defense tactics

id like to hang on to us

like ive said before, this is a terrible placement for my happiness

but thats what you've become

another source of

i know you didnt ask to be

so im sure you can understand what this is doing to me

i wish i hadnt taken you so seriously

when you so relentlessly asked not to be

misplaced efforts, energy waste

time to end the chase

used up all my wishes on daydreams

so if you're going to take off my glasses

because theyre rose pink

please do so quickly

-g.m.t