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Dinner Date Conundrum

Nope! Don’t Think So!

By Andrew C McDonaldPublished 2 years ago • Updated 2 years ago • 1 min read

Pumpernickel bread …

What the hell is pumpernickel?

Sounds like a cheap whore

Think I’ll pass mate

Not quite ready to meet my fate

Rather experience a tad bit more

Took a sniff

Smelled a tad strange

Maybe I should explore possibilities

Expand my personal range

Nah, I’ll stick with basic white

Doesn’t make my stomach want to fight

What’s that? .. Escargot?

Snails.. ?

Oh hells

Slimy little buggers

Belong in the garden

That’s a taste I won’t be regardin’

Chocolate covered ants?

Why?

To put down the back of my pants?

I can have sweet skid marks and ..

Ants in my pants

I’m not some shaman

Roasting crickets on a stick

Rather have a popsicle to take my licks

What the hell ever happened to a nice rare steak

A potato with cheese and bacon I can nicely bake

You say I should expand my palate

I don’t need artichoke in my salad

Sounds like if I eat them I artichoke

And gag

And grab for a rag

I’d rather deal with my stomach pooch

Than ask someone who eats snails

For a nice little smooch

So pardon me while while I order up a burger

With fries on the side for a perfect merger

Next date .. I pick the restaurant …

humor

About the Creator

Andrew C McDonald

Andrew McDonald was a 911 dispatcher for 30 yrs with a B.S. in Math (1985). He served as an Army officer 1985 to 1992, honorably exiting a captain.

Never mind. I give up.

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    Written by Andrew C McDonald