Dear Future--Love M.

Dear Future,

Will I have a Bright future?

I know it's hard to say…

I wish I could believe that things would get better.

Sadly, it's not.

The darkness is still there.

I wish someone could know me before the mid-2010s or early 2020s.

It's almost 2023(2022 is getting closer to the end).

It's been in a dark world with hellish cults from violence and hate that our world turned into an endless nightmare.

It's been too much for me in years.

I can't stand it anymore!

If things are getting bleaker forever, I don't know if I'll survive any longer.

Why?

Because– I'm one of those beings that the monstrous leader of the cult hates– a woman, disabled, and queer.

It means that I will no longer see myself as a human or a citizen on this earth.

I would become more of an object and less valuable forever just like in the past.

I wish someone could believe my concerns but sadly they just want me to keep silent and all those phrases like ‘get over it and ‘don't be a baby.

If something happens to me, they would ignore me and laugh at me even more.

I lost someone who is close to me and has been so busy these days with no response to my call.

I felt betrayed by my home, my close ones, my friends, my family, my country, and my community.

Every time I see it's bleak, bleak, bleak, and bleak-every day and night and then the next day more bleakness.

I don't know if I'll be around for next year, 5-10 years. I will be gone soon –I don't know when.

I wish things could get better, but it's too late now. The Nightmare will never be gone and I will never wake up.

Love, M.