Conflicted

I am different, I am the same as everyone else.

Feeble whilst invincible, exquisite though hideous, vibrant yet listless.

How could that be? Believe me I'd love to know.

Soulful although villainous, sagacious but idiotic, squalid and pure.

More and more and also a bit more...

Sincere and misleading. Rebellious and hopeless. Tender and harsh.

A whole lacking ambivalence.

I knew best to stay unknown from the slyness.

But I didn't.

I lost in order to gain, and gained to sorrow over my hazy colors.

Grasping on the black that was left for me.

Striving lustfully to give up on sins, I danced alone and tripped over forgotten crowds.

I said, “Hello, and goodbye.”

I lived to love, and then loved to die.

My best companion, my worst foe, is no one else but me.