ceremony of grief

I walked through days turning into weeks turning into months and years filled with doom. I watched roses bleed dry and die in vain. It left scars on my soul like bullet holes you can't ignore. You hear the creaking bones in the abandoned halls. You notice how the clocks stopped turning as the burning in your ears wreak havoc upon the consciousness. I watched the reflection change. Morphing into decay and lingering in sorrow hoping it claims me like death. Every time I drifted close enough something ripped me from the wounds. I had to suffer it. Again and again. There were soldiers there to hold the fort as I recovered from the burns and the poisons. I would barely hang on and yet they never flinched. Now I see clearly the energy being exchanged. I watched tears drip from the cross within a room full of demons and sin. Drowning in the crucifixion of defeat and deceit. I stared into the oblivion of voids multiplying and collapsing.

I eventually saw the end and realized I had to start there. For beginning in the start is just the end repeating itself. Strange how crazy you feel around the wrong people. So I listened to the eyes of the youth. The ones who only knew unconditional love even in confusion. I listened to the protector in me. How it applies to my queen and how sacred she is. I listened to the wrath of my ancient coding. Now I stand still in storms. I consume the storm and direct them. I shiver. I fret. I endure as we all do but a tribal mantra screams in my soul. Intention and desire complete tribulations and open locked doors. Even if you must break them Like kicking the door in and pulling the pin of the grenade. Disaster occurs. People dissolve and pain becomes real.

I sat there in shackles. Shaking and pulling at my chains. I waited for death to evaporate me but I was left to endure the grief. I was left with a burden to become more. So here I am. A howling wolf wounded by the village burning in my past. I watch the flames like a teacher bound to the gallows. Confessing truth like a god. In this I find the self of my vision. A manifestation of power and faith. Now I now I must show my truest form to all of those closest to me.

I walk towards the crown. I see into his hatred and defeat. I see right through the corrosive destructive hole in his chest. I see how it poured into my mind and how it devoured my hope. It was all just a prison I was meant to break. Like a cycle meant to see an end. I feed upon the corpses like a vampire starving for emotion. I eat the dead to learn the sacrifice needed to grow beyond time. I am nothing less than a king who must decompose the path. I am the one who will create beyond imagination. I will pick them up when they fall for they do the same for me.

There was a moment I heard the song of my vibration. I declared war upon myself. I found intentions to break open the catastrophic destroyer. In a lake of fire I was reborn like a forge building a weapon. I left behind the lies and disaster. In this I lost family and friends. The ones who stayed where apart of my vengeance. I realized my purpose by choice. I reflected on my decision to over throw an empire of self destruction. Yes I will bleed again. Yes I will break and rebuild over and over. I see now how timeless I am in this legacy. I fight for something more than myself and in this I find courage to be selfless in helping others. Not strangers but the brotherhood.

Brick by brick I build an empire. I make a seat for thy queen. Built in blood and mud. I do not worry or concern myself with others opinions. For, I am the one who sees through the wealth of material. I find my wealth abundant in spirituality and heart. I hold the honor of the dead. i carry them through this timeline for I choose my destiny and I bring them with me. They couldn't so I did. Watch me.