Brother

The pale moon swells and I stare into its unfeeling grey glow

Brother I know it plagues you so

Brother I know the sun shines light on all that denies you

I’ve seen you hide away and give up and everyday it tears at my very soul

So beaten and bruised and lacerations that lay you bare

Open and bleeding staring up at the ceiling looking up at its popcorned texture

for reasons to heal or reasons to care

I know you aren’t here near me

But I hear your tears as they fall to the floor below

And I know …

I know brother…

what hurts you within

How Its plagued over and over again

The same sorrow I feel is not too dissimilar to yours

The same sorrow of longing

A longing for home

Sometimes I imagine it but none of our loved ones are there

And somehow In the silence we both sit a we stare

At a old technicolor television tube

My arm over your shoulder just watching cartoons

No screaming or fighting no denial of you

We finally find our home under the pale senseless moon

Til we meet again you’ll always be my best friend

Even when you burnt all your bridges

And dug your deepest hole

And laid down to die in it

Because in its deep and dark labyrinth

You’ve forgotten which way to go….

I promise I’ll find you in life or in death

I’m sorry you feel denied as I do and it’s shortened your breath

It’s forked your tongue and rip your cerebellum into

Just as it has for me it’s has in many ways worse for you

But I know you can find redemption I can find it too

We both can find happiness and escape this hell

we were born non consensually into

Because I remember the day

When we dreamed and we laughed and I tucked you in bed just after a bath

And read a story “ my big brother and me”

The last time I remember seeing you peacefully sleep.