broken forever

it has become increasingly impossible

to bear this life every single day

I hear these things and I give up

on the entire mankind in this state

they will never admit they said it

their lips remain silent after being caught red-handed

but I know there’s a reason for it

it was about getting rid of me, letting me feel

unfit for anything

but kindness, so I heard

that I’m a boy now and I stumbled

by people more skilled than me

those who are at the beginning of their journey

the ones never broken

those who spend money on trivial things

and make me listen to the side effects

what they drank, who they fucked, how many children they have

switching partners each time

and not knowing the after-effects

of this game of luck and hate

when they stand, my hair stands on end

intimidation flows in a wide stream

of their knowledge and my abandonment

as if I were inexistent

it’s happened before, you know

you’re not the first invisible fist to strike

now I’m forced to hide my pain

under the pillow during the longest sleep

I dream of freedom wrapped in all these quirks

they dream about their dream team to finally breathe

as if I had been told from the start:

“you don’t stand a chance

you will be broken by the people who made you

they won’t kill you, they’ll let you suffer

and suffer, and suffer, and suffer more

they will never get enough; their lips will be silent forever”

taking that little spark of life away from me

I’d have it if they hadn’t been like this all my life