Bright, Shiny, and New

My mind acts like it’s happening today.

I know others expected it more than I.

You were never capable of loving me in return.

I finally see the

person I became while trying to be an acceptable version.

I thought love meant killing off the bad parts of

me that actually make me myself.

You preferred my fake self, so I

kept letting myself be shaped

and twisted into someone you might want around,

believing if I pretended, I would be enough for you.

I held on to hope much longer than I should have because

giving up meant facing the truth, which I'm doing now.

You never saw a future for you and I,

so I have

to admit that I need to

be done with you and grow

into who I was avoiding, who I am am supposed to be, into

someone you will never recognize, someone

bright, shiny, and new.

**********************************************************************I took the line "Today I return the version of myself I shaped around you because now I have to grow into someone new" from Christian Sanchez's poem "Today I Return" to create this Golden Shovel poem.

Here's the link to his poem: https://vocal.media/poets/today-i-return