Bedlam

I’ve never known what true silence sounds like, or feels like even.

My mind is a hellish cacophony of 900 different voices, a sharp ringing sound that never goes away.

On better days it will dull, but even then it is not much relief.

You learn to tune it out at some point.

You learn to tune out those voices and demons all telling you different things, things that may or may not even be true. You have no real way of knowing.

They prattle on, about anything and everything, and somehow also nothing.

I scream at them to shut up, please, just once.

Just once.

They laugh, and do not listen.

They will never listen, so why do I even try?

Perhaps somewhere, tucked deep inside that crowd of gossip and conspiracies and paranoia, is a smaller voice who will listen.

Perhaps they have the power to get them all to be quiet, even if it is just for a few moments.

Or, perhaps not.

Perhaps I’m just losing my mind.

Who knows?