An Angel

He lives in the space between spaces, They said

The angel asleep in a void out of time

I will count myself lucky as lucid, I guess

But a fool flying out, finding somewhere to hide

Waking up angry that I didn't stay

I didn't focus enough on your face

To see if you're my dreamer

A lasting embrace of the souls crossing paths--

But the angel gave chase

Outside the void was a human Cafe

I sat down hurried, and acted "okay"

Put on a mask and then quietly prayed

That the character with me would simply stay silent

I could have stood there before you

Asking if you were my love

I could have been deleted

For asking if you were the one

Souls meeting nightly but rarely

Wait for another shared dream

I wish you were here- but really

I'm tearing apart at the seams

Time lays waste to the lonely

Hearts wake from sleep, shedding tears

I've been hollowed out, slowly but surely

Watching others live all these years

I want a conversation

But I find you in my memories

A dream stemming back to old traumas

"Wish I could have been there"

That's sweet but I'm telling you,

I want to know your real name

Now I find a dreamer and I'm giving chase

Without thought for alarm

or my trauma-shed wings

I could find you if I just search well enough

I'm not an entity, I'm just a lover

Deprived of their lover's embrace

Watching time fly by,

breathing the harm

Of the sheer isolation I'm trying to hide

I want you, for real

I want your eyes

I Want a whisper, a kiss

An argument, sweet nothings

A house with kids

I want to stop hearing people say

They have a clue what it feels like to wait

I want to feel your hands on my waist

But I know you and I

Have so run out of patience...

My spirit cries in Our sleep

My days an hour glass,

Holding a secret mass

Mourning something that has not started yet

People speak of breakups

I'm finding I'm jealous of even regrets

Because I'm not really single--

I'm just reserved.

But that's not a question for auto insurance...

I can't pay health care for someone not here

The waking world witnesses me holding dear

Onto something they might call insanity

I want everything with you

But I'm not losing sleep...

Only faith as this goes on corroding me.

I feel like my heart liquefied in my chest

And the orbs flying at me are doing their best

(Or their damnedest)

Cause I can't go Astral to find you

If I'm this afraid they might have a way in

Because it's not enough they've been mocking you

See you in sleep and it's only a ruse

I know the difference-- and now they do too.

(Of course at this point they've learned better)

I see a demon, and it's instant peril-- for them

The HOW DARE YOU go copy his face!!!!

Instant interrogation

My teeth at their throat

and they're leaking black blood--

This is the cost for impersonation

They shouldn't have copied you

Throwing your semblance back in my face

As if I haven't been hypervigilant

Looking around in real life, afraid

Terrified that our paths would cross

And I'd miss it

I'm looking out for a thing I can't prove

The Seafoam tint of

your eyes-- after all this time,

You're still electric

You even found me in dreams when I've moved.

But we both said this isn't enough

The morning I tasted your soul

I'm consigned now to feeling surrounded

If you're possible, no giving up

I'm just watching this

deepen the chasm within me

Take my heart, crush it to dust

It's not even there-- it's a black hole

That's slowly appeared in my chest

I could not possibly tell you enough

How consumed by this hurting I've been

Because dreams aren't the same as life

I know the difference--

Though I might wish at times that I didn't

But I'm not insane (only nearly)

I'm just a soul who fell for another

In sleep