After Last Night

my heart lay heavy this morn

constant reminders of my people's stagnance holds my breathe

all talk

shyt talk

behind closed doors and backs

its nothing personal

nothing at all

we not personal persons

is we?

we say this

and we say this some more

but we don't say that

and we don't do that

we don't do this either

we don't do doodoo

i already know this

i KNOW this

and that

still hurts

cause its still true

save yourself

save myself?

can you save yourself?

myself?

what about ...

YOURSELF!!!

can you save yourself???

if you cannot what hope is there for others???

save myself!!!

does that mean don't care?

no

what does that mean then?

when i save myself I'll let you know

you haven't saved yourself yet?

i'm still talking to you aren't i

but you said you'd let me know

i know what i said

should i believe you?

believe none of what you see and half of what you hear

how about what i feel

good question

whats the answer?

you should know, you asked it

i'm no better off than when i started

i know that feeling

did you believe it?

it was ... unbelievable

i don't know what to do

how to begin

so much emotion

so much concern

so little guidance

so little support

being all alone on a personal journey sure makes a strong person weak

i can't say its not fair

i can't say its not right

i can't say its not unoriginal

i can say i don't know what to say

or do

or think

or feel at this point

which direction to my walking papers

marching orders

am i to sit still until further directions?

can i sit still until further directions?