A Woody

I always wondered why an erection is also called a woody, in slang, of course, but still, why a woody and not, for example, a stick-shift, an English cucumber, a special carrot, a fuck-you-gravity (up to a certain age), and many other potential appellations.

Moreover (move over), a woody tends to deflate when the blood rushes back in to get away from the prick, and thus a woody is quite temporary, even fleeting at times.

When one is young, it tends to point to the sky. When middle-aged, it looks across the aisle for help. When older, it looks at the floor reminiscing about the good old days when the sky was blue and life was still promising.

A woody is a good name, after all, since if left alone, a tree can live for thousands of years, unlike us, killers of trees and so many other life forms, who are afraid to die as if we could do anything about it, yet call the culmination of making love or fucking, dying.

We tend to die a lot before the real coup de grâce.