A moment in time
Scenery
Sharp jaggedly cliffs
The blazing warm sun on me
Sound of ocean waves
About the Creator
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More stories from Paige Turner and writers in Poets and other communities.
One Minute to Noon
“OK, guys!” I screech over the macaw-like chatter in my sophomore English class. My students are sharing mementos they accumulated during summer vacation. The assignment is to interview each other and write an expository essay about another student’s treasure: Misty’s coquina shells and sand dollars from Florida, Ruth’s two Navajo pottery mugs from New Mexico, Roxy’s perfume from Paris, Kevin’s chocolate from Hershey Pennsylvania, a picador’s sword from a bullfight in San Fermin Spain, where one of my favorite students, Manny Pérez, ran with the bulls at festival.
By Lacy Loar-Gruenler5 days ago in Fiction
Comments (1)
Love the use of “jaggedly,” so concrete and tangible. “The blazing warm sun” closes the haiku with a sense of peace and feeling the sun on one’s face. The second line is dramatic and it introduces water strongly but it also takes over the peace of the other two lines because of its length and choppiness (although the choppiness echoes the waves). The challenge would be to reduce that watery and airy emotion of the second line to 7 syllables like reducing a perfume to its core essence.