The Many Jobs of a Cat

If my cat knew that I was writing this, he would likely be giving me one of his ‘Are you serious looks?’ While he is extremely intelligent, some days he just doesn’t understand boundaries or compliments. Therefore, he might see his nomination as something menial that his human is attending to instead of doling out treats. But, as I think about all of the jobs that he attends to in a day, I think he deserves to be empawyee of the month.

Each morning my cat, whom we’ll refer to as H to protect his identity, especially if he takes to leaning over the computer screen to read this, jumps on my bed and will poke at me if I don’t get up fast enough. I have an alarm clock but often H is ahead of it. I guess he’d like to put the noisy beast out of business.

H also sends me off to work and greets me when I get home each day. I’m not sure that it is because he is genuinely happy to have me home, or if he just likes the treats, which happen to be kept in the same cupboard as my cell phone.

He is also busy being on patrol, inside of the house to make sure that things seem to be in order. He runs upstairs and down testing all the beds and making sure that none of the other cats have received any snacks when he wasn’t around.

My spirited feline is also a bodyguard. Often, he takes his job much too far, even following me into the washroom. He also likes to sit on top of the dishwasher as you’ll see from the picture that is included with his nomination. I must admit it isn’t the best photo of him. He isn’t one to sit still for very long. He saw my attempt at photography to be unnecessary when I could be feeding him.

He also sees my computer as a threat and frequently climbs up onto the raised ledge that is part of my desk and pushes against my laptop lid. I’m not sure if it is his attempt to get me to finish my work for the day so that I can sit down on the sofa and pet him, even if it’s much too early in the day for that, or if he is simply against technology. Or, maybe he thinks, we should be watching cat videos or looking up recipes on how to create him a gourmet meal instead of writing romances and fairy tales.

But, if I think about what makes a good empawyee, he has many fine qualities. He always shows up on time, even ahead of his shift which seems to run 24-7. H doesn’t ask for any overtime pay, although some days he begs for treats far more frequently than he is allowed them. So, perhaps this is his attempt at trying to get a raise.

He is also detail oriented. H’s food bowl has to be filled just so. Being able to see even a little bit of the bottom when there is still a substantial amount of food in it is a big no-no. Perhaps he has an interest in architecture or mathematics since the food bowl should be level.

H is also devoted to having a good exercise regime. He gets his steps in everyday. He always takes the stairs and is quite the gymnast too. He’s able to turn his body into circles and doesn’t seem to mind hanging off the table or desk upside down.

H is also very curious and must inspect anything which is not in his place. I don’t know if he just wants to make sure no new pets have been brought into his house or if he sees it as his work as my bodyguard.

H is quite the cat and as trying as he can be some days with his antics, I am pleased to be able to call him mine and to nominate him for this special honor of empawyee of the month.