Your Comfort Zone Is Your Enemy.

This place is not my “safe space” it’s lonely here, I believed I was giving myself personal time by separating myself from the world. I need time to heal, I need to focus on what has been holding me hostage from my potentials. Day by day I wrestles with procrastination and fear when I’m trying to do something productive, only when I’m indulging in the lust of my flesh it get quiet in my mind, only when I am not trying to tap into my potentials I feel at ease and comfortable. The moment I try to escape the thoughts of “I can’t” and “I’m not” and start doing productive things and when I start affirming myself in the mirror to encourage myself, it gets loud in my mind again. But I’m free right? I’m just taking personal time away so that I can get better, I don’t need people, I don’t need a support system, I’ve got this!

It’s been two and a half years, still in personal time? I’m not talking to myself, I’m just thinking out loud. Wait, If I answer a question I asked, that’s me talking to me, myself, but it’s normal right? No one knows, but the Uber guy who was watching me get my grocery bags out of his trunk, who am I talking too? I didn’t realize I talk to myself. Or am I talking to myself? What’s there punishing my soul when I try to escape the prison of my mind? Fear and procrastination are the prison guards that keeps me from getting free, but along the way I’ve convinced myself that I’m free, I am just having personal time away, I need to heal, but what have I healed from? What have I accomplished in my personal time away? I spend more time fighting my thoughts, I have not felt peace, I have cried more tears than I laughed. Is this really personal time? I’m I healing? I’m I free? It’s so lonely here.

It’s time to get out of here, but if I leave my space, they’ll hurt me, so I’m safer here, you know what, I will write that book that I’ve been wanting to write, but who will read it? I have to pay for an editor and a publisher. I’ve been wanting to lose weight and this is the perfect time to go to the gym, but who am I kidding, I’ve been overweight all of my life, I’m meant to be this size. Well how about I Start a business? Ha. That’s something I’ll never succeed in, I know nothing about a business, I just need to take a walk and get some fresh air but I do not have the energy to do so. I’m drained from my thoughts, so I will just lay here.

It’s safer here, there is no failures, no disappointments, I know what to expect, I’m so comfortable here, no fears to face, now it’s quiet again, I’m not wrestling with my thoughts, I’m actually agreeing with them, I don’t feel the weight of procrastination coming against me. I’m safe, or am I?

Your comfort zone is not your “safe space”, your comfort zone keeps you from reaching your full potential, fear paralyzed your ability to do great things and procrastination is that friend that talks you out of doing great things. There’s no freedom in your comfort zone, there’s no healing, a decade will pass by and before you know it you are still stuck in the same train of thoughts. Get up, and learn to become comfortable with being uncomfortable, on the other side of fear is courage. Stop being afraid to live life, stop being afraid of people, and get a support system. Find people you can trust, people that are healthy minded. I’s time come out of the prison of your mind that you call your “comfort Zone” and embrace freedom. The world need your gift, you have something to offer.