Writers Need to Practice Getting out of Our Own Way If We Actually Want to Improve

I’m confident this statement isn’t going to come as a shock to many of you, but as writers, we often are our own worst enemies.

I know, right? Who would have thought about it?

For so many reasons, and because we often battle several different demons each day, it’s often tough to deal with the overwhelm. I mean, look, we have Impostor Syndrome, which most times strikes without warning.

Well, maybe we do get a warning, but I never hear the sirens. I guess I should have my ears rechecked.

We deal with writer’s block (whether myth or not) that paralyzes a lot of us daily. We struggle to keep our heads above the waters of despair as we examine our less than meteoric rise to the top of our craft.

And with each of us, we try to write something, sometimes anything, in a desperate attempt to keep the creative juices flowing.

On top of all those problems, there is one that hits us the most. One that none of us really like talking much about it. The issue where we stop ourselves from writing something, even though we know it has the making of an outstanding story. Or worse, we write it and feel the flush of embarrassment stinging in our cheeks as we edit, and then we just trash can the entire story.

Ever been there? Yes, you have. We all have.

This situation is the most difficult to admit to ourselves and others. It’s because there’s a ton of shame attached to making a decision not to write or publish something because we’re embarrassed, timid, or afraid.

A lot of us have grown up being taught not to share our dirty laundry, our very personal thoughts, feeling or secrets.

I can’t count the number of times I was told nobody needs to know some of the terrible things that happened to my family or even the stupid and downright wrong things I’ve done in my life.

My dad always had his favorite saying.

“90% of the people in this world don’t want to hear about your problems. 10% are glad you’ve got ‘em.”

What we refuse to tell ourselves is that our reading public doesn’t necessarily want to hear about those things because most of them are experiencing the situations themselves at this very moment.

What our reading community often wants to know is how we, the writer, went through the kind of experiences they are currently going through, and what we did to make things better for ourselves.

Even if we have yet to be completely free of whatever pain and sorrow we’re experiencing.

Our readers want to believe there’s a remote chance of making it through the gauntlet to the other side. If you are doing it, then maybe they can too.

Just like us, our readers need hope.

But it’s tough as heck to write from a place of that much vulnerability. Most of us are fragile creatures on the inside, no matter how tough we preach or appear to be on the outside. None of us like exposing our tender underbellies to the world and then possibly taking a beating for it.

But in order to grow as a writer, in order to get better at your craft, you have to write what works for both you and the reader.

A lot of times, in fact, most times, this means you must learn how to send that alter-ego of yours — the one throwing a mental tantrum and screaming at you to not write the story — to the corner for a time out.

At least long enough for you to write the story, edit it and yes, publish it for all the world to read.

We all know it’s not as easy as I’m making it sound here, right?

There are a lot of times when we Just-Can’t-Do-It.

So we try writing something else, something not as personal or emotional as the story we really wanted to write. For me, it’s really tough to write from a vulnerable place. I suppose that’s why I write a lot of fiction.

A make-believe world can’t hurt you if you’re the one pulling all the strings.

But recently, I learned there are times when I just need to send my own alter-ego into the corner and write about topics that make me feel.

Topics that make me sad, angry, or disappointed. Things that incite a flaming rage inside me.

Or pieces that may help writers new and old look at something from a different perspective and maybe readjust their thinking.

There are times when I write from a been-there-done-that perspective, and while it certainly doesn’t mean I’m an expert on any topic, the story may help reunite a jaded writer with the passion they used to have.

Or give a fledgling writer the boost they need to carry on.

It could happen.

But it won’t if I don’t stop listening to my alter-ego who continues to tell me not to write the story. It won’t happen if I write in fear that people will say I’m an embarrassment to myself, or that I’m not good enough to write from such a deep emotional place as that.

If I continue to listen to my alter-ego telling me to never write stories like that, I won’t. And then someone else who has learned to ignore their alto-ego screaming at them from the corner will.

And all I can say after reading it is, I could have said that.

As a writer, we all need to learn to get out of our own way every day and just write what we feel, or how we think or comment on something which interests us, troubles us or shocks us.

We need to stop always playing it safe and listening to our alto-egos and somehow find a way to get what’s inside us out there in front of our readers.

Send that alter-ego to the corner and start writing until you’re finished each and every day. A little time out, standing in the corner won’t hurt them, and it will certainly do a lot for you.

Thanks for reading.

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© P.G. Barnett, 2020. All Rights Reserved.