Why it’s okay you’re not performing during the Corona Pandemic

“I finally have the time, so why aren’t I performing as I’d like to be?”

Perhaps you’re familiar with this inner narrative? Countless memes and social media posts popping up indicating I'm not alone in the current "I should be getting more done with the time I now have" narrative. The time I always complain about not having to put toward the things I want in life. Putting pressure and expectation on myself isn't anything new, I'm no stranger to it. Luckily I have the awareness to recognize this pattern is currently occurring within myself, and it’s no surprise.

If you're like me this may remind you of childhood scholarly struggles of not being able to hold attention on a task, and being told the problem is laziness and class clowning.

The unhealthy takeaway? “I’m not good enough, I need to work harder, I am not worthy”. We can now realize this is a bit unreasonable knowing what we now know about Attention Deficit Disorder, isn’t it? A mental difference that was once an unknown, a mystery. Having this awareness back then would have alleviated a lot of self and societally imposed pressure.

So what are we currently not seeing or understanding about ourselves in this current dynamic and narrative? Are there parts of ourselves we don’t fully understand that operate without our knowing? Yet also influence our very way of being in the world. Of course there are, one being our subconscious. So why are we pressuring ourselves right now?

Let’s focus on the root of the “problem” rather than the symptom, shall we?

What we all need to remember is that, yes we may have more time on our hands right now, but it's not the same dynamic as it would have been two months ago if let’s say we chose to take a sabbatical or some time away from our day jobs and focus on ourselves. Amongst this COVID-19 pandemic, there are new stresses and uncertainties in our lives, one’s the majority of us have never navigated before. Whether we know it or not, our subconscious is likely having a bit of a shit festival riddled with uncertainty and insecurity. There are aspects of ourselves that at times puzzle us and other aspects we do not know, and that’s okay. We can still develop self-awareness if we choose so, but we’ll leave that topic for another time and blog post.

We are adjusting to a new way of living, whether we realize it or not, our subconscious' is undergoing a big adjustment. So why do we expect that our performance can and will be what it would have been two months ago? We now live in a different world than we did back then, and our psyches are trying to find new homeostasis. This takes time, just look how difficult it can be to form new healthy habits in the best of times.

Our subconscious is always seeking homeostasis or normalcy, which I believe very few of us have right now. So how can we expect our performance levels to be where they are during times of security and certainty? We can’t. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself. Stop shoulding all over yourself. It’s okay if you don’t have the 6-pack abs you thought you would by now. It’s okay that you haven’t written that book, finished that online course, caught up on your reading, learning new recipes, etc… It’s okay to be exactly the way you are right now.

Remember to be kind, be gentle, be accepting, be fair. First and foremost with yourself. Release all the “shoulds” you are putting on yourself. Once you can find this acceptance of your life's "new norm" you will be able to find acceptance of how the mysterious parts of yourself are adjusting. Furthermore, you will be able to find acceptance for those around you and in your circle.

Acceptance is the path to serenity.

We have to remember that not a single one of us has navigated a world event like this before, so how can we have the same expectations of ourselves that we had before?

If there was ever a time in our lives to practice acceptance for the aspects of ourselves we don’t understand, it's now. The time for self-care is now.

Stay safe, be gentle with yourself, practice self-care, and ACCEPT YOURSELF. Even if that looks like eating chips & chocolate while binge-watching "Friends" for the 5th time, just maybe go for a walk too.

Contact Life Force Coach - Kevin Venn and book your Free Discovery Session now.