Why I'm not competing this year

I’ve changed my plans for this year and I want you to know it’s ok for you to change yours.

So, the basic to bikini series is taking a hiatus.. but it will be back.

In case you haven’t heard yet, we are in unprecedented times. It is unlikely that anyone is living their life unaffected by the pandemic. It’s a unique time where we’re trying to (and almost being forced to) be as productive as possible. Social media has been inundated with content encouraging us to use this time to develop our skills, pick up a new hobby or start a side hustle, but I think there is something much more important that we should all be focusing on: our health and wellbeing. Both physical health and mental wellbeing, but especially mental wellbeing.

Take a moment to think back to when the clock ticked over from 11:59pm on 31 December 2019 to 12:00am 1 January 2020, marking the start of a new year (I know it feels like forever ago!). Some people had plans established prior to the beginning of the year, while others used the start of a new year to set goals, regardless, we all went into the year unaware of how different and interrupted our lives would be just three months later.

It is reasonable that when the pandemic first hit, we thought we would be able to continue in the pursuit of these goals, but let me tell you, if you need to put those goals on the bench for now, you can. You have not failed. There is no failure in choosing you and doing what is best for you.

Some people will find their goals are unaffected by the pandemic, but for others, each day can be a constant battle between forcing behaviours that contribute to your goal while sacrificing your happiness, or choosing to look after, and protect, your positive mindset. When faced with this decision, mental wellbeing needs to be a priority every time. You can set new goals later, you can pick up those other goals when the time is right, but trying to rebuild a positive mindset is not quite as easy.

This is why I have decided to postpone competing. I don’t know when I will compete, but I know I will. At this stage, the most important thing to me is protecting my mental wellbeing and my healthy relationship with food and exercising. In recent weeks, I realised that each day I was making a decision between forcing myself to do things that weren’t aligning with me on that day in order to stay on track (which in turn was sacrificing my mental wellbeing) or choosing to give myself a break, “going easy” on myself and choosing to do the things that made me feel happy and content.

I want to point out that it wasn’t as simple as just making the decision to postpone competing and ta-dah, I felt at ease. No. I had to acknowledge quite a few negative thoughts, for instance, my inner mean girl was very quick to tell me I was just being lazy and quitting because I didn’t want to put the effort in. My advice to you is to write down all of the thoughts you have, and then ask yourself: “if I am putting myself first, if I am doing something in my best interest, what would I be doing?”. This should help you work out if your negative thoughts are warranted. In my decision to postpone competing, if I sat down and asked myself that same question, and the answer came back as competing would make me happy and would be putting myself first, then I wouldn’t postpone it. But that wasn’t the answer I had for that question. I knew that giving myself some freedom and flexibility back into my life would contribute to my mental wellbeing in a positive way.

So, this might be the time your inner mean girl (or boy) comes out in full force. We know we see people’s highlight reels on social media, and now we’re seeing their highlight reel of how they’re spending this time, but it’s still just their highlight reel. We’re not seeing them sit in front of the TV for two hours, or seeing them sleep in until midday. Do not compare what you’re doing during this pandemic to what everyone else is doing on social media.

You don’t have to stop chasing after your goals or striving for success, but whatever you choose to do each and every day must come from a place of love. It must make you feel happy right down to your core because that is what's going to protect your mental wellbeing: choosing you and doing what you want to do.

I want you to do the best you can to ignore the need, and the pressure, to be productive during this time. If you all do each day are the things that make you happy - if all you do is look after yourself - that’s as productive as you need to be. And if those things are exercising, picking up a new hobby, learning a new skill, taking an online class - and it makes you happy - then do that. But if you don’t want to do those things, don’t. No one said you have to be productive during a pandemic, there are no rules. This is still your life and your wellbeing is more important now than ever before.