What I Learned While Taking a Bachata Lesson

On Friday night I was bored as ever. Just moving to my mom’s small hometown almost three years ago, I met quite a few new people but all of them were much older than I, and they were more of my mom’s friends. With no real friends of my own, as all of my best friends lived out of state, I decided I needed a new adventure, solely of my own choosing. Mom and her friends had tickets to a semi-formal gala for some club or charity she and my family had supported. Faced with having to find a dress or pantsuit and strappy shoes to throw on, it just didn’t feel right. Did I really want to spend my night sitting and listening to people talk about things I had no idea of or cared to be bothered with? I had grown tired of settling for a Friday night at home but I didn’t want to end up at a nightclub or bar either.

I live in central Florida, about forty-five minutes to an hour outside of Orlando. My town is small, everyone knows each other and it’s perfect if you don’t want to live in the city. There aren’t very many things to do around here so unless you know someone, it makes for a pretty boring weekend most of the time. Since moving here, I’ve made the hour trek to Orlando to hang out at the gay clubs. I’m not gay myself, but I love the atmosphere and the music and I have met some awesome people at these clubs. I also love the drag shows. You can always catch me front and center at a drag show with my drink cheering and have such a great time, but this particular Friday, I needed a bit of a change. I needed to find something to do that would take me out of my comfort zone. It was thumbing through the “nearby places” section of Facebook that I settled on a Salsa club. DING DING DING!!!!

Growing up I have always wanted to learn how to dance Salsa but was always too scared to try. I learned how to Flamenco when I was fourteen, and loved it so much but never felt confident enough to really dance with a partner. God forbid if my boyfriend tries to dance with me, I don’t know how to let a man lead me in dance let alone actually try and keep up with him. At that moment I thought: “what’s the worst that can happen? I fall flat on my ass and make a spectacle of myself in front of complete strangers”. This Salsa studio was located just over an hour drive from home, at least none of these people would ever see me again around the neighborhood if I end up looking like a complete idiot. For just seven dollars, you get a Salsa lesson and the dance social that follows is totally free. I felt like I hit the jackpot as far as finding something to do without killing my pocket. I quickly showered and threw some comfortable clothes on. A pair of jeans, my black tank top under my grey and black striped long sleeve shirt and my black converse all stars. I saw in the videos on the facebook page how most of the women dancing were wearing heels and tight clothing. I felt I just wasn’t ready to break an ankle so my sneakers were perfect.

The lesson started around seven but I didn’t arrive at the studio until eight fifteen. I saw a few doors down from the studio was a rather large bowling alley. I felt that if my Salsa lesson was a bust at least I could enjoy taking my frustration out on the lanes. As I parked my car and started walking to the door of the studio, I became extremely anxious. What if I look stupid? What if I feel overdressed and stick out like a sore thumb? What if no one dances with me? I then made a beeline straight for the bowling alley. I walked around inside of the massive bowling alley, it was jam-packed full of people enjoying themselves. The bowling alley had a decent sized shop where you could purchase new balls or necessities, a HUGE arcade with bright dazzling lights, a full sized bar, and a fast food concession stand. I started feeling pretty good about my last minute decision until I walked up to the counter to pay for a few games. Since it was before ten pm, the cost to bowl was fifteen per hour and that wasn’t including shoe rental. I instantly became angry with myself.

You decided to drive an hour away to bowl?!? Ali are you nuts??

Luckily I knew that I would try and pull a stunt like this so I prepared myself before leaving the house, only putting twenty dollars in my pocket. I knew I couldn’t afford to bowl with the allotted amount. I came to Salsa, and I was gonna Salsa.

I then walked down the strip just a couple doors down to the Salsa studio and I called my boyfriend for encouragement. He sensed I was anxious so he calmed me instantly and said: “don’t worry, they’ll love you, go get em champ”! I hung up the phone and opened the door to the studio and stepped in.

Inside of the studio, I saw couples twirling and spinning with their arms in the air. The ladies looked as if they had been dancing for life, they were so beautifully styled, knowing when to turn and how to be led by their partner, when to move their hips and when to put their arms out to be spun and dipped. I stood in the line of people paying their admission and watched the couples on the floor, still working up the nerve to pay my admission, until finally, it was my turn. The lady behind the counter smiled and listened to me weakly ask how much it would be for just one lesson. She sensed my nervousness and replied, “it’s twelve dollars for one lesson but you also have the option of purchasing a package of lessons”. She then grabbed the pretty laminated sign that sat on the counter and moved it into my sight. The first line of the sign stated that ten lessons were eighty-nine dollars. I replied thank you promptly handed her my twenty dollar bill that I had folded up in my pocket. She then asked me my name and printed out a name tag for me to wear on my shirt. She gave me a small form to fill out and stated that the Salsa class was full and had already started but I could take the Bachata class. I had never heard of Bachata but I was very willing to learn since I was already there and paid my admission. I slapped my nametag on my chest, thanked the lady behind the counter and walked to stand on the side of the studio. A couple also walked up and stood beside me. They both smiled and said hello. In my mind I thought, oh my God they’re friendly! It completely eased my nerves. As people were pouring in, they would make eye contact with me, smile and say hello. I felt better already.

Looking around at people, I didn’t feel so out of place, many people were wearing yoga pants and comfortable shoes. Others were dressed up in tight clothes and heels, nice blouses and shirts, everyone looked so relaxed and ready to have fun. After watching people dance on the floor for five minutes, a younger guy named Austin walked up and yelled “BACHATA!!! LET’S DANCE”! That was my cue. Myself, and a group of what looked to be about eighteen other people all formed three lines behind Austin who established himself as our teacher. Austin hopped in the front and the DJ started playing a mix of “All My Life” by K-Ci & Jojo except it was a Spanish mix. I loved it instantly. Slowly over the beat, we started to follow his lead as he shouted out the instructions. Next to me was an older lady and she was smiling at me as we both looked like we had been talked into this but brave enough to try it. She sensed in me a kindred spirit as she moved next to me, along with me. As we braved the left and right turns she praised me and cheered me on and I did so conversely. She also grabbed my hand a few times to help me along the way. I started sliding around in my converse and quickly learned I had on the wrong type of shoe. Once the music stopped and we ended our group dance, Austin, with a huge smile on his face clapped for us and then started teaching us how to do the steps to the Bachata. I felt in that short time I had accomplished something, as did the rest of my classmates, I could see the look of amazement and relief on their faces. I noticed my classmates were a mixture of young and older, all of different shapes and sizes. Some came with partners, some came alone, like me. I felt comfortable that we were all in this together.

As the class progressed, I started to finally feel comfortable enough in the steps as everyone else seemed to as well. I thought “Oh my word!!! I’m dancing”!!! Then Austin threw us a for a loop from left field: “Everyone partner up and stand in a circle around me”! As people grabbed their partner, there were about four of us that came alone, Austin then made clear that we would learn each part of the dance and we would rotate partners in between so that everyone will have a chance to dance together. I felt the anxiety build up in my chest. I had never danced with someone this closely before. As each man rotated to dance with me, he would smile and introduce himself, although he was wearing a nametag, and as we danced together, we would look into my eyes and lead me. I’ve never learned to just let someone lead me in dance and as I stated earlier and I felt nervous about it, but each partner put me at more ease than the one before him. We would dance together and then he would rotate to the next lady, saying giving praise and thanks to me for going to the next. When my turn came to dance with Austin, I felt so confident that I was learning this dance so quickly that letting him lead me was as easy as breathing.

We finished our lesson by performing the entire dance with a partner, and when the music ended, Austin then told us that we were welcome to stay for the social, which was free dancing since we had already paid for the lesson. There was a cash bar with liquor and also water for purchase. I walked up to the bar and purchased bottled water for two dollars and took a seat and watched the couples dance together to the music while the lights were lowered. The music was amazing. People were dancing together while some sat on the sidelines and socialized with each other and had a few drinks. More and more people started arriving at the door and soon it turned into a packed Salsa club. Everyone was smiling and dancing. I noticed the time as it was starting to get late and I had a little over an hour drive home.

As I walked back to my car, I felt so proud of myself for stepping out of my comfort zone and trying something new. Since the new year is coming, I’ve decided that every month I would try something new that I wouldn’t normally do and that I would feel my life would be richer by having done so. I learned that trying something new and possibly scary, it can lead to a worthwhile experience. I encourage all of you to do the same!!