WE CANNOT BLOOM WHEN IT’S DARK

I am fighting the forces that try to down me. These forces are sometimes invisible because they are subtle. They come from lots of things that we deal with on a daily basis. These are forces of the world. Of the society we live in. These are compromises that try to collide us into deals we do not want to do, but capture our souls with some incentives we believe we need. We are made wishful for things we do not require. We are made believe that we are less than what we truly are.

We are like opened flowers in the dark hoping the dawn is soon to finally live. But we die in the dark. We are flowers. We cannot bloom in the dark.

You are fighting with your ego. With yourself. With your spirit. Your mind is not letting you see the scream your heart is trying to pull out to force you to see a different type of force that needs your attention and your enslavement. You are a slave of this empty world of persons that are not real. You are a slave of your mind. When you should be enslaved only to your own self. And maybe you do not like the word “slave”. But how else can you call someone that denies oneself a happy tranquil life doing what one enjoys and what one experiences flow state with? How can you name someone that gives their time to something that has lost its meaning, its purpose, its joy, it’s fun? Is it not a prison? Like a cage we set ourselves up to willingly, believing that if it’s nicely adorned, we are going to be happy inside. In the box of our own minds and brains. In the dark. We can never be free when we are safe inside. Locked away from the feelings of letting oneself surrender to life, to its powers, to its TRUE REAL forces that would only lead us to our enlightenment.

We are fighting with each other instead of fighting against the ego we hold on in our hearts, draining our energies to pursue our vocations, our passions, our love for life. We fight with our hearts to go to a place we do not belong, with the delusion that if we go there, we will eventually belong…somewhere. We fight each other because some of us do have the courage to stand up for others. And we fight those people that try to set us free from our own enslavement and our own blindness to the reality we each make for ourselves as we tolerate it for us to exist. We tolerate our lives in certain ways because we have not experienced any new ways, any better ways. We fight, we struggle, we hustle and we believe that this is how life should be. This is what we were born for. To hustle. To fight. To demand. To go for it.

But I fight with myself daily to not lose my perspective. I fight with my own mind and heart and spirit and character to not fight with the wrong army or against a friend disguised by others into an enemy. But I fight to fight the fight.

We fight. We fight. We fight. To stay alive and colourful and vibrant and happy in the cold dark. But we won’t bloom in any more than what we managed to do so, up until the dark came over us.

The darkness keeps us all separated. Afraid of who is there. Vigilant to fight someone or something. We don’t know. It’s too dark to see. We need to strike back. We need to fight…

I wonder if this continuous war in the world is not actually an expression of the war that struggles to come to a peace inside ourselves, between our own forces. The forces of our minds, of our souls and of our spirits. Of our sense to do justice. To not have not had justice. To not have been made wrong by something or someone, or even by our own voices.

I wonder how this jungle can be tamed. How can we even learn tranquillity if the environment we live in, is never at peace? How can we demand of ourselves to be at peace and calm and present when we are surrounded with hate, with wars, with struggles, with injustice and with the stress that comes from all that? How can we ask of ourselves to live in the present, to be in the now, when we do not like the present? How can we judge ourselves for wanting to escape reality because it is too harsh, it is injustice, it is not fair at all? How can we blame other people for doing this, when we contribute through our indifference and ignorance of the world situation, to that environment?

Why can’t we see that we are all enslaved to this war zone and we perpetuate it by ignoring to fight it? We fight, but we actually fight to hide. To hide from the truth and to hide the truth because we are afraid of what it might do to us if we reveal it to ourselves even and to others as well. We would really need to fight at that point.

But I still fight. Silently. Until it cannot stay inside this fight and it will show on the outside.

I fight.