The Year Gone By: Counting Blessings Despite Difficulties

2020 began on a high note. I was just back from a life-altering solo trip to four cities in eleven days, and the adrenaline rushing through my veins made me make a new year resolution that, come what may, 2020 should see me on at least three solo trips. Sadly, the Covid19 scare started in March 2020, and most of what I'd planned failed to happen.

On the surface of it, most of 2020 was spent with me glued to a keyboard. But if I look back and really reflect, this year has been full of blessings. Here is a month-wise breakdown of all the amazing things that happened to me this year that I'm super grateful for.

January 2020: Some Quiet Time with Loved Ones

I spent the first two days of 2020 with my family. It was a beautiful, quiet time with some quality moments spent with my favourite people on the planet. My little brother was home for the holidays. The four of us managed to be together after more than a year, and this is a time I'll cherish forever.

15th January marked Magh Bihu - the harvest festival of Assam. Traditionally, this day marked the time when farmers of ancient Assam harvested their crops and had a feast with family and friends at night. The morning marked the beginning of a new season, where traditionally a huge bonfire was burnt to signify the chasing away of winter by the upcoming spring season.

We celebrated Magh Bihu at our college with a get-together of all the faculty members and students. On the night of January 14th, we celebrated Uruka - or the communal feast with a delicious dinner of rice with roasted fish, chicken and duck meat. The next morning, arrangements were made in the ground for a bonfire where we performed our prayers and ushered in Spring.

On 29th of January, the whole of India celebrated Saraswati Puja - the day of the year dedicated to the worship of Maa Saraswati - the goddess of learning and wisdom. While I am not an overly religious person, social gatherings like these give me a chance to reconnect with my friends and colleagues. Also, the sound of the ceremonial drums, the smell of incense in the air, and the festive vibes all around bring me peace of mind and one more reason to reflect on the days gone by and be grateful for all the gifts bestowed by life. They also provide an excuse to dress up in my traditional finery and feel pretty.

February: Experiments, Self-Growth & the Only Trip of 2020

While January was all about cherishing the time with family and friends, February was more directed towards trying out new avenues and learning more about myself. I took part in two poetry slams, and even though I didn't win, I'm grateful that I held my ground and did my best. Performing in front of a live audience is never easy. How do you say 'Shut up' to that voice inside your head that keeps on telling you 'You're not good enough'? But I did it, and that's better than not showing up.

There was a huge upheaval in my personal life right after these events, and I found myself in a dark place. I was living alone, avoiding even my closest friends, and not eating or sleeping on time. When the opportunity to go on a field trip to a hill station called Haflong came up, I almost said no. However, it was a work trip - one that I couldn't wiggle my way out of. Looking back, I'm grateful I went there, because the trip allowed me to step out of my room after almost two weeks, and make some lasting bonds with the students. Also, this was the last trip I went on before the pandemic started, so I'm lucky I got to experience these beautiful places and people.

March: Pre and Post Lockdown

The Covid19-induced lockdown was officially declared in India on 25th March 2020. Before that, I'm lucky I got to attend two author events.

The first was at Indian Institute of Information Technology, Guwahati - a premier engineering institute in India. I was invited as a part of their Women's Day events to give a talk on "Women in Literature". I'm grateful that I got the chance to present in front of so many young and curious minds. The audience was enthussiastic, receptive and full of enlightening questions and topics for discussion.

On the very next day, I was invited to perform at the Women's Day special Poetry Open Mic at The Bibliophilia Cafe, Guwahati. The evening was graced by two of India's most celebrated poets. It was such a pleasure to perform amongst a group of young men and women who recited amazing poems dedicated to womanhood and the celebration of feminity in India.

Then, the lockdown was declared and all places of work were shut down. I had a good initial few days - staying in my sleep clothes all day long and working from home. I was grateful to have some time off for myself, without having to plaster a smile on my face when I didn't feel like it. This also gave me a chance to focus on my writing because of the time I'd otherwise have spent in commuting to my place of work.

April and May: Culinary Experiments, Online Events, and Lots of Writing

As the lockdown stretched into its later weeks, like several others, I started feeling trapped. Especially because I was living alone, I had no one to talk to except over calls and video chats. YouTube came to my rescue during this time - with its plethora of recipes and cooking videos. I've never been a fan of cooking, but with the extra time on my hands, I had fun trying out new dishes and enjoying a wide range of cuisines. Looking back, I'm grateful that I got a chance to spend time brushing my culinary skills. Before this, I couldn't spend a single minute in the kitchen without wishing I was somewhere else.

As you can see - the start of 2020 gave me my fair share of public speaking events. The adrenaline rush was addictive, but there was little I could do to keep up the pace with the entire country shut down. I took to the internet and started hosting live sessions with authors, poets, and other creatives on Instagram via live sessions. I called the entire series #LockdownDiariesWithAnangsha and chatted with eight people over a span of six weeks. It was an incredible learning experience that not only helped me engage with my Instagram audience better, but also quenched my thirst for public speaking.

I also got a chance to work on my novel. I averaged at 2000+ words daily and on April 21, 2020, I completed the manuscript. At 28 chapters and nine interludes, the first draft stood at 87,548 words.

This was an overwhelming feeling. More than excitement, I felt relief that I no longer needed to push myself to write, to work on a project I'd been engaged in for so long. That I could finally let myself relax, watch some movies, and do anything other than work.

June: Back Home and Exploring YouTube

On June 1, 2020, I hitched a ride with a relative and travelled all the way back home via car. I'm not going to lie - it was one of the tensest rides of my life. I had my mask all along the way and sanitised my hands each time I stepped out of the car. The Covid tests at rest stops gave me a mini anxiety attack (what if I test positive?), but thankfully, I reached home safe and sound.

June was a peaceful month. I'm thankful for the following:

• I spent a lot of quality time with my parents.
• I took fitness seriously and started working out daily.
• I got back to working on my YouTube channel and posted at least one video each week.
• I spent half an hour each day walking on the terrace - listening to an audiobook while watching the sunset. This gave me peace and offered a chance to sort my thoughts at the end of a busy day.

This was around the time I started writing daily on Medium and earned my first $690. As someone who got crazy happy with $2 tips on Kofi, this was a huge amount. It only motivated me to write more and keep polishing my skills. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have had this much time to work on my writing had it not been for the lockdown. I'm grateful that it presented me with such a unique opportunity for reflection and growth.

July and August: Writing and Editing Aggressively

After a break of two months, I finally got around to editing the manuscript for my novel. It was a long process and I had to ideate and read a lot before I could finally sit down to edit, but the feeling of satisfaction was worth it. My time investment on Medium was also reaping rewards and I made it a habit to write at least 30 articles each month.

Work on my day job was going slow, but there was little I had to regret, as my writing was presenting me so many opportunities. I got invited to a lot of podcasts, email interviews, and collaboration videos - and each one was a learning experience. I also spent a lot of time talking with my parents, working on my fitness goals, and walking about on the terrace. All in all, July was a good month.

September: Family Functions and My First $1000

My younger brother managed to book a flight home, and for the first time since early January, the four of us were together again. I'm grateful for the quality time we spent together, and how we managed to strengthen our bonds in such a difficult time. In the first week of September, there was a family function at my uncle's place, which also gave me a chance to reconnect with my cousins after so long.

Aside from this, I wrote my first commissioned piece on Medium for $500. Sure, I had made money from my articles before, but I'd never managed to make $500 from a single article. This was a huge achievement, and I was so fueled by adrenaline, that I immediately wrote another piece. Imagine my happiness when my second piece also got accepted. This was the first time in my life I made more than twice the salary from my day job through writing and it was a huge moment for me. I'm so grateful because these pieces made me believe that my writing has value to be accepted on an international platform. As a non-native English speaker, this means the world to me.

October: Back to Living Alone

After spending a blissful four months with my family, I finally had to move back to the place where I work. I was terrified of how I'll adjust to an empty two-bedroom apartment after living in a house full of laughter for so long. The first few days were tough. I barely had any motivation to get out of bed, and I couldn't publish anything new for over a week. However, slowly, things started falling into place and I established a new routine. I was already working out twice a day when I was at home, and I continued that. A big factor that worked in the favour of improving my mood was how my body was showing the results of the exercises. I lost 10Kgs and my waistline dropped from 32 inches to 28 inches. This boosted my confidence and motivated me to keep working out, no matter how hard it was.

The workout routine and the upbeat playlist I'd chosen helped keep me grounded. I designed my entire routine around the exercises, and slowly, the other tasks fell into place. Yes, it was still hard, but my writing was going places and I couldn't have been more grateful. I wrote 19 articles in October and made $1440 - my highest so far in any month.

November: Accepting my Place and Growing Steadily

I wrote another commissioned piece. I got accepted into a Medium-owned publication. I made $1000+ from writing, but the highlight of November for me is that I got my first job offer because of writing on Medium. Most of the details are still hush-hush, but I just signed my contract and I'm so excited to start. I've never had anyone pay me a salary for writing, and this only gives me amazing opportunities to look forward to.

When it comes to discovering and loving underrated books, 2020 has been an amazing year. As of November 24, 2020, I’ve read 80 books and loved most of them with all my heart. I crushed my Goodreads Challenge and discovered some amazing beauties. Here are the 10 best books I read in 2020.

Final Thoughts

This year has been 90% sitting at my desk, staring at a computer screen, and freaking out about how the Covid19 cases are exploding. I've had friends succumb to the disease, lost some important relationships, and barely made any progress on the project I was supposed to complete at my day job. But when I look back, a lot has happened. I'm grateful to the Thankful Thoughts Challenge for making me reflect on my blessings in the past year.

If I had to summarise, the biggest lessons I learned this year are:

• Progress might be slow. Progress comes in different forms. But as long as you keep challenging yourself, there's no way you won't move ahead.
• Success doesn't require massive efforts or time. It requires alignment of your hard work and dreams, and a dogged determination to not give up no matter what.
• As an independent content creator, you might feel demotivated if what you considered your "masterpiece" failed, but consistency is the key, and you've got to keep creating, irrespective of the results.
• Most of the times, you don't need money or luxury to be happy. The time spent with your loved ones can be the biggest blessing.
• There will be chaos. Things rarely ever go according to plan. The surest way to keep progressing is to stop trying to be in control all the time and adapt to the changes life throws at you.

We may not realize it at the moment, but, we’re each highly resilient creatures who have achieved a lot despite the challenging circumstances.