The "Joys" of Adulting

As I'm sure anyone reading this (assuming you're around your mid-20's and older) would know, being an adult is incredibly rough. It looked fun when we were kids, but really, it's just more stress and hassle and I don't know about y'all... But I've been finding myself doing more and more things that I really don't want to do just to get by in my life. When did being an adult go from being fun to being stressfully depressing? Why can't anything as an adult be as easy as most of our parents made it look? Well, I might not have all the answers to those questions... Ok, I don't really have an answer at all for those. But here's what I do have: Hope. And in a world where having Hope is the most useful thing you can have, I'm here to tell you how to keep that spark alive.

Now, I know that Hope can be a dangerous thing. And sometimes, it really is. Most of the time, however, it's incredibly useful and necessary to push through the tough side of being an adult. Real quick, I want you to pause and reflect on each of the following statements:

• My life is chaotic and busy and I rarely have time for my family/friends.
• I feel stuck at my job because I don't like it but it's all I have and I need it to survive.
• Any hobby or project I start gets pushed aside because I can't find the time I would like to devote to it.
• All the what-if's of the world keep swarming my head and I can't help but feel stressed/anxious because of it.
• I'm terrified of messing up because I feel I don't have the time/enough opportunities to fix or re-do it.

If you agreed to at least 2 of those statements... You are not alone. While it's not healthy for us to be in such negative headspaces, it genuinely just can't be helped sometimes and that's the part that sucks the most about being an adult. In my opinion, at least. Before I continue, I just want it to be known that currently, I agree with all of the statements above. I desperately just need a hug, but with this pandemic... I can only offer a virtual hug. If you're like me and just need a hug, here you go; a virtual hug that, with each person who reads this, becomes a group hug because the world needs more wholesome moments and love in general.

Alright, now that we've had our wholesome moment... Let's talk about how to find joy in the little things, even within the parts we don't like as adults.

The first thing to remember is that it's ok to slow down and "smell the roses" from time to time. In fact, I personally find that life is so much more worthwhile when you take a moment not only notice the small things, but appreciate them as well. The warm feeling of sunshine on your skin, the soft fur of a kitten or a puppy, the smell of bacon the mornings my fiancé decides to cook, the little *ting* a bell makes. All of these things make me feel happy and at peace, if only for just a moment. Find your moment, cherish it, and save it to your mental happy place.

Speaking of mental happy places... I highly advise you have one. It might feel silly the first few times you try to visit it, but if you're like me and working a job you really just don't like but you need money to pay the bills... Having a mental happy place works wonders on getting through the rest of the day. The best way to start your mental happy space is by closing your eyes and visualizing a serene landscape. For me, it's a lush, green forest with lot's of "God-rays" lighting up the place. For my friend, it's a moonlit beach on a hot summer's night. Whatever it is for you, that mental scape is now your safe zone. From there, you can visualize any animals or people that bring you joy. Or alternatively, visualize yourself going on an adventure through your happy place. And voila! Mental Happy Place achieved!! My favorite thing about visiting my Happy Place is that I only need 5 minutes there to feel better about wherever I am in reality. So give it a shot next time you're feeling just a little miserable in your current surroundings!

Now, this next piece of advice is going to be a bit tricky, especially for those of us leading hectic lives with little to no free-time... But call your parents if you can. Or your grandparents. Or your closest friends. Just call whoever you can that's been there for you through it all. I mention this because it helps in a couple of different ways. First, you never really know how long you have with them. A call can go a long way for y'all to stay connected, and if anything happens, you'll feel less guilt/regret down the road. The second way it helps is more light-hearted and simple: as humans, we love talking to the people we trust the most. It's our way of validating what we're feeling, staying up-to date in the world around us, and most importantly, getting out of our own heads. It may not always feel like talking to your parents/grandparents/close friends does all that, but have you ever noticed how much more relaxed you feel after talking and catching up with them? You don't have to talk to them constantly, but try to make time for them once a week or so at minimum.

It's the little things that make life what it is. Adulting is already hard enough, so why do we insist on being so hard on ourselves on top of it all? Let this article be a reminder that it's time to take a moment for yourself, so get out there (as best you can) and focus on things that make you happy! Find time for these things, and adult life will feel so much more manageable.

Thank you for reading, and if I was able to help you feel any better, please share this with others who need it. We all deserve happiness, and finding joy in the small things is one of the best ways to get that happiness in life we deserve, after all!