The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
HABIT 1: BE PROACTIVE PART 3
CIRCLE OF CONCERN/CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE
Another excellent way to become more self-aware regarding our own degree of proactivity is
to look at where we focus our time and energy. We each have a wide range of concerns—our
health, our children, problems at work, the national debt, nuclear war. We could separate those
from things in which we have no particular mental or emotional involvement by creating a
“Circle of Concern.”As we look at those things within our Circle of Concern, it becomes apparent that there are
some things over which we have no real control and others that we can do something about. We
could identify those concerns in the latter group by circumscribing them within a smaller Circle
of Influence.
By determining which of these two circles is the focus of most of our time and energy, we can
discover much about the degree of our proactivity.
Proactive people focus their efforts in the Circle of Influence. They work on the things they
can do something about. The nature of their energy is positive, enlarging and magnifying,
causing their Circle of Influence to increase.
Reactive people, on the other hand, focus their efforts in the Circle of Concern. They focus on
the weakness of other people, the problems in the environment, and circumstances over which
they have no control. Their focus results in blaming and accusing attitudes, reactive language,
and increased feelings of victimization. The negative energy generated by that focus, combined
with neglect in areas they could do something about, causes their Circle of Influence to shrink.
As long as we are working in our Circle of Concern, we empower the things within it to
control us. We aren’t taking the proactive initiative necessary to effect positive change.
Earlier, I shared with you the story of my son who was having serious problems in school.
Sandra and I were deeply concerned about his apparent weaknesses and about the way other
people were treating him.
But those things were in our Circle of Concern. As long as we focused our efforts on those
things, we accomplished nothing, except to increase our own feelings of inadequacy and
helplessness and to reinforce our son’s dependence.
It was only when we went to work in our Circle of Influence, when we focused on our own
paradigms, that we began to create a positive energy that changed ourselves and eventually
influenced our son as well. By working on ourselves instead of worrying about conditions, we
were able to influence the conditions.
Because of position, wealth, role, or relationships, there are some circumstances in which a
person’s Circle of Influence is larger than his or her Circle of Concern.
This situation reflects a self-inflicted emotional myopia—another reactive selfish life-style
focused in the Circle of Concern.
Though they may have to prioritize the use of their influence, proactive people have a Circle
of Concern that is at least as big as their Circle of Influence, accepting the responsibility to use
their influence effectively.
DIRECT, INDIRECT, AND NO CONTROL
The problems we face fall in one of three areas: direct control (problems involving our own
behavior); indirect control (problems involving other people’s behavior); or no control (problems
we can do nothing about, such as our past or situational realities). The proactive approach puts
the first step in the solution of all three kinds of problems within our present Circle of Influence.
Direct control problems are solved by working on our habits. They are obviously within our
Circle of Influence. These are the “Private Victories” of Habits 1, 2, and 3.
Indirect control problems are solved by changing our methods of influence. These are the
“Public Victories” of Habits 4, 5, and 6. I have personally identified over 30 separate methods of
human influence—as separate as empathy is from confrontation, as separate as example is from
persuasion. Most people have only three or four of these methods in their repertoire, starting
usually with reasoning, and, if that doesn’t work, moving to flight or fight. How liberating it is to
accept the idea that I can learn new methods of human influence instead of constantly trying to
use old ineffective methods to “shape up” someone else!
No control problems involve taking the responsibility to change the line on the bottom on our
face—to smile, to genuinely and peacefully accept these problems and learn to live with them,
even though we don’t like them. In this way, we do not empower these problems to control us.
We share in the spirit embodied in the Alcoholics Anonymous prayer, “Lord, give me the
courage to change the things which can and ought to be changed, the serenity to accept the things
which cannot be changed, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
Whether a problem is direct, indirect, or no control, we have in our hands the first step to the
solution. Changing our habits, changing our methods of influence and changing the way we see
our no control problems are all within our Circle of Influence.
EXPANDING THE CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE
It is inspiring to realize that in choosing our response to circumstance, we powerfully affect
our circumstance. When we change one part of the chemical formula, we change the nature of
the results.
***
I worked with one organization for several years that was headed by a very dynamic person. He
could read trends. He was creative, talented, capable, and brilliant—and everyone knew it. But
he had a very dictatorial style of management. He tended to treat people like “gofers,” as if they
didn’t have any judgment. His manner of speaking to those who worked in the organization was,
“Go for this… go for that… now do this… now do that—I’ll make the decisions.”
The net effect was that he alienated almost the entire executive team surrounding him. They
would gather in the corridors and complain to each other about him. Their discussion was all
very sophisticated, very articulate, as if they were trying to help the situation. But they did it
endlessly, absolving themselves of responsibility in the name of the president’s weaknesses.
“You can’t imagine what’s happened this time,” someone would say. “The other day he went
into my department. I had everything all laid out. But he came in and gave totally different
signals. Everything I’d done for months was shot, just like that. I don’t know how I’m supposed
to keep working for him. How long will it be until he retires?”
“He’s only fifty-nine,” someone else would respond. “Do you think you can survive for six
more years?”
“I don’t know. He’s the kind of person they probably won’t retire anyway.”
But one of the executives was proactive. He was driven by values, not feelings. He took the
initiative—he anticipated, he empathized, he read the situation. He was not blind to the
president’s weaknesses; but instead of criticizing them, he would compensate for them. Where
the president was weak in his style, he’d try to buffer his own people and make such weaknesses
irrelevant. And he’d work with the president’s strengths—his vision, talent, creativity.
This man focused on his Circle of Influence. He was treated like a gofer, also. But he would
do more than what was expected. He anticipated the president’s need. He read with empathy the
president’s underlying concern, so when he presented information, he also gave his analysis and
his recommendations based on that analysis.
As I sat one day with the president in an advisory capacity, he said, “Stephen, I just can’t
believe what this man has done. He’s not only given me the information I requested, but he’s
provided additional information that’s exactly what we needed. He even gave me his analysis of
it in terms of my deepest concerns, and a list of his recommendations.
“The recommendations are consistent with the analysis, and the analysis is consistent with the
data. He’s remarkable! What a relief not to have to worry about this part of the business.”
At the next meeting, it was “go for this” and “go for that” to all the executives… but one. To
this man, it was “What’s your opinion?” His Circle of Influence had grown.
This caused quite a stir in the organization. The reactive minds in the executive corridors
began shooting their vindictive ammunition at this proactive man.
It’s the nature of reactive people to absolve themselves of responsibility. It’s so much safer to
say, “I am not responsible.” If I say “I am responsible,” I might have to say, “I am irresponsible.”
It would be very hard for me to say that I have the power to choose my response and that the
response I have chosen has resulted in my involvement in a negative, collusive environment,
especially if for years I have absolved myself of responsibility for results in the name of someone
else’s weaknesses.
So these executives focused on finding more information, more ammunition, more evidence
as to why they weren’t responsible.
But this man was proactive toward them, too. Little by little, his Circle of Influence toward
them grew also. It continued to expand to the extent that eventually no one made any significant
moves in the organization without that man’s involvement and approval, including the president.
But the president did not feel threatened because this man’s strength complemented his strength
and compensated for his weaknesses. So he had the strength of two people, a complementary
team.
This man’s success was not dependent on his circumstances. Many others were in the same
situation. It was his chosen response to those circumstances, his focus on his Circle of Influence,
that made the difference.
***
There are some people who interpret “proactive” to mean pushy, aggressive, or insensitive; but
that isn’t the case at all. Proactive people aren’t pushy. They’re smart, they’re value driven, they
read reality, and they know what’s needed.
Look at Gandhi. While his accusers were in the legislative chambers criticizing him because
he wouldn’t join in their Circle of Concern rhetoric condemning the British Empire for their
subjugation of the Indian people, Gandhi was out in the rice paddies, quietly, slowly,
imperceptibly expanding his Circle of Influence with the field laborers. A groundswell of
support, of trust, of confidence followed him through the countryside. Though he held no office
or political position, through compassion, courage, fasting, and moral persuasion he eventually
brought England to its knees, breaking political domination of three hundred million people with
the power of his greatly expanded Circle of Influence.
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