Take time for yourself

There are a number of things I learned from 2020, and, moving forward, a lot of things Id like to do more this year, like everyone else I guess. More than just listing resolutions as something that we can look back on in 365 days and regret, there’s definitely small changes I know I can make which, ultimately, will make me feel better, and sometimes improve the lives of others round me too, so why not?

Firstly, this is my dynamic working document, not all these ideas will work for everyone, and that’s cool, they wont all work for me, but the trick is to try, and if something need tweaking then I can, without beating myself up about it.

One of the good things, yes there were, from last year is that I managed to connect with some friends who I’ve not spoken to in years, with google meeting, zoom, messenger etc, distance is no longer an excuse. Yeah there are connection problems, and mute moments, and its not like a hug, but its nice to be able to chat, we have quizzes and role play games, and chew the fat, its like having my mates in the living room, even when they’re miles away. I’m going to be doing more of that.

Which is great if your friends are all online and collected, but not everyone is. Remember the days sat in the bar when you didn’t know who’d come through the door or sit at the next table? When you’d roll your eyes at certain individuals who came in lest they wanted to talk about mundanity and waste precious time? (Different on a screen, you control who you’re chatting to). Those people are still out there, some of them lonely, some of them offline. So this year I’m going to be more tolerant, Im going to connect with more individuals, and look out for them, every friendship needs to be nurtured and is important, so I aim to promote some acquaintances, and to be nicer overall. I’m not suggesting that everyone should adopt a pensioner and talk at them incessantly, but I’m hoping to make more friends this year, won’t do any harm to try.

This year I’m going to create more than I destroy. I like writing, reading, acting and that will continue, but I need to put time aside to write. I frequently have ideas when I’m out working, shopping or walking, awesome, ground-breaking ideas, at the time. Promptly forgotten when I get home, wake up or eat lunch. So the plan is, next small change will be to always have a small notebook and pencil to hand, so as to not to forget the schemes as and when they occur to me. Ill note ideas as they arise, feelings, thoughts, suggestions, shopping lists… you get the idea.

The plan is to walk more, alone, and with others, it’s the easiest thing to change and doesn’t take long, we wont necessarily go far. Restrictions today limited our distance but my daughter and I walked a little today, we had company and to be honest, the same conversation we’d have had over coffee, but the fresh air and the scenery made the chat into an achievement. Wish Id taken my notebook.

This year Im going to seek solace. Ive always been jealous of people with actual faith, not just in religion, but in football teams, in something that sustains them. This year Im going to be at peace, and Im going to do this by believing in myself, and by worship, in my own way.

Taking notice of small things whilst out is something Id like to do more of, shells on the beach, weeds in the architecture, each one beautiful in its own way, but Id like to savour them, to describe them in my minds eye, knowing full well that they’ll be different next time, so I didn’t take any pictures, in fact we went for a walk without our phones or any tech at all, bliss.

We should all drink more water, you know, like Ive been promising to do for years, starting by getting up for a glass of water before I even put the kettle on. Doing anything before putting the kettle on was unthinkable, and very 2020.

2020 was a disastrous year for many charities, the various restrictions making conventional fundraising impossible, so in 2021 my aim is to donate more, tidy more, declutter and donate. Ill also donate time, take part in one of the well organised fund raising adventures for charity. From my experiences in raising money for Unison and the NSPCC these events are always safe, fun and very spiritually rewarding.

I hope you’ve enjoyed reading my thoughts on a fresh start, good luck in whatever you do.

I imagine you’re thinking “where on earth will you find time to do this?” And that’s part of it, I try and work every day, but some things are important enough that I can make time, like getting up five minutes earlier each day, and some things will fill what previously was wasted time, like going to the pub after work or flicking through channels, not that those aren’t worthwhile pastimes, Ill just do them less and efficient, productive stuff more. Well, that’s the plan anyway.