Short introduction to my mind

Too many words while time doesn’t stop. who am I?

An Undefined mess in progress.

I got a big list of wants. In my mind, I should have had it by now. Why couldn’t I just have grown up with everything I wanted, and to turn into who I want to be. But if that were to have happened, nothing in my life would be real. It would mean nothing.

I grew up with very little. I had a roof over my head, a half full (always ran late on the grocery shopping) fridge, but I was content.

I never knew anything else .

Then I found music, and my god has it defined me in a way I never Would have known was possible. The beat knew how to get to me. Break the barrier between my thoughts and emotions. It found me when I didn’t know i could be found.

I had my family around me, but it was never easy. There was a lot of split ups, fights, and toxicity. I never knew how to mange it all. I kept sinking, kept thinking about the what if’s. What if I had more loving parents, what if I had more love in me? And what if i was who I wanted to be, the fake, unreal version of me.

I now see that’s not what I want. I want to be able to stand up tall, and declare the love I found in myself after so much soul searching. I wanted to feel everything without feeling shame or guilt.

I want to be proud of what I’ve overcome and been through Because I’ve learned that what I’ve been through defines me. There’s nothing wrong with that.

You can lead a happy life,

Despite what happened to you. It all mentally matured me. I’m still growing as a person. Into the person I will work into becoming. A healthy, beautiful inspiring women for the world to see. You can’t fake it to make, it doesn’t work like that. Be who you are. Go through the ups and down without Shame and always love where you came from. Only you know what your potential can come to be. It can be huge, if you allow yourself to carry on through the mysterious forest of this life, even when your vision is gone and you feel as though your walking in the dark, tripping on your past failures and mistakes.

Just because you trip, doesn’t mean you won’t reach your exit. Keep stumbling, until you see your light. It’s there. :

This should probably be longer, but it’s just my intro. More will come.. I’m waiting on it.