Learning My Self-worth and Finding my Happiness During a Quarantine

Life since March has not been easy on any of us and it hasn't gotten any easier and for most has gotten much worse. The world is spiraling and so is my mental state, my depression hit an all-time low. I lost a lot of people after graduating from High School and let me tell you, I was a shell of a human being in my teen years. Didn't acknowledge a single good thing about myself no matter how many times my friends tried to drill into my head that I was a good person but I had very low self-esteem. I truly believed I was an unattractive human being from a very young age. But, despite all that, this was not the lowest I've ever been even because I faced even more hardship then petty drama.

Fast forward to now, this quarantine was surprisingly good and bad on my mental health, I had time to self reflect for once and assess my emotions as they came doesn't mean I always got it right it takes time and that in itself I'm currently learning to come to terms with. I'm 23 years old unemployed 3- time college drop-out with credit card debt from impulsively shopping all the time but I digress. It is what it is, self-loathing was not going to make me happy and complaining about what seemed to be a hopeless situation was not going to change anything. I knew that finding a job without a degree and having zero work experience was not an easy task especially, however, given the world's current state I chose not to stress it and move to something I could do like putting work into my aspirations.

Being an artist, for me was all I ever wanted, whether that was in writing, drawing, painting, I liked to dabble in everything and anything I resonated with. I always found my voice in my art, without fail and that always brought me the utmost joy though I do admit I lost it for quite some time and surprisingly enough this quarantine helped bring it back. It helped me realize my self worth along the way and that I deserve happiness and that my time is worth it whether that is for myself or others. Simply by finding people who believe me and support me no matter what I choose and I honestly forgot how many I had and how many I've gained in the past year alone, it was really just one but sometimes one is all you need and that's amazing. Through her help, I was able to find my motivation again into tattoo art and to start creating a tattoo portfolio and for so much more. My dreams are simple, a small and comfortable living doing what makes me happy, making art, without pressures of a deadline, or getting yelled out by an overbearing boss because I will be my own boss.

Making an Etsy shop, selling prints, paintings, sculptures my plans are endless! Working as a tattoo artist, blogging, sharing my life, and helping others learn from my stories would be just as amazing! Writing a children's book, a poetry novel is something I've always aspired to do. In fact, I've already written one a couple of years back in 2016 for a contest. I didn't win, but the experience was great nonetheless. What about all of the above? why not? reach for the stars as they say and I fully intend to! That's all anyone ever should do.