I Promise

Dear Me,

Happy 2021.

Dear Me,

Thank you! I hope so. I mean I really hope so, because 2020 was pretty not-happy.

I know I’m not alone in having had a bad year in 2020, but while knowing that other people had challenges offered some comfort, it didn’t make it any easier to handle the unique challenges I had.

I lost two people close to me, one to suicide.

I lost my job.

I gained so much weight I couldn’t fit into very many of my clothes anymore.

But that was 2020, and now it’s 2021. And I’m making myself, my 2021 self, some promises.

I promise to stop binge-eating. I promise to continue watching what I eat, and lose the weight and inches that kept me out of my work clothes.

I promise to continue journaling what’s in my head since it makes me feel better to get the feelings out and helps me get a new perspective, which helps me make better decisions.

I promise to keep writing articles and stories as well, since I love doing that.

I promise to keep meditating. I’m getting better at it again after not doing it regularly for the past couple of years. I’m feeling the benefits, and know this is something I want in my life.

I promise to keep reading the kind of books and articles that make me want to be a better person and motivate me to keep moving in that direction.

I also promise to keep watch uplifting and motivational movies, documentaries, TED talks, and anything else that gives me hope and keeps me on the “right track.”

I promise to reach out to other people when I’m feeling like I can’t do it on my own. I’ve learned isolating myself because I don’t want to bother or drag someone down is not helpful.

I promise to keep looking for a new job, and believing that the perfect job for me is out there. And if I feel the need to take a job that doesn’t seem perfect, I promise not to complain about it, and to make the absolute best of the situation.

I promise to continue practicing safe COVID-19 practices for as long as they are necessary. And to get the vaccine as soon as I can. While that may or may not make me part of the solution, at least it won’t make me part of the problem. I never want to be part of the problem.

I promise to continue recognizing how much I have to be grateful for. Even the littlest things that happen around me are things I can give gratitude for, from money found on the ground, or free books to read from the library and my Amazon Prime membership, to sunshiny days.

I promise to be open to more promises I may want or need to make to myself in 2021, because I know how life can sometimes throw something at you that completely changes everything. And conversely, I promise that if I totally need to get rid of one of my previous promises, I will, knowing that letting it go is the best thing.

I promise that if I break one of these promises, I’ll be nice to myself about it and just start keeping the promise again. This is probably the best promise of all. Doing this isn’t something I’ve been very good at in the past, but this isn’t the past. It’s now. It’s 2021.

Some of these promises will be harder than others to keep. I know that. Some may be darn near impossible. But I also know how important they are, and I’m going to do my best. I promise.

So, goodbye 2020. Like so many people, I’m thrilled to have you gone.

Hello 2021. Hello me in 2021. I hope it’s good year. I plan to make it a good year (not just hope for it), no matter what happens. I can do that. It’s entirely within my power.

And there’s one last promise. I’m going to save this letter, pull it out on December 31sI 2021 and see how I did.