I Love Me!

I'm learning to love myself. It's been hard, and tiring, and it's taking almost forever, but it's happening. Like any normal human, sometimes I need little tricks to help me get through. Here are some of the ways I remind myself that I'm loved!

Self-Love Stickies

I have weird beliefs. One of them is that, the more you look at something, the more you'll believe in it. That's why I believe in things like dream boards. It just makes sense to me. Let's say that I colour my nose purple. Every time I look in the mirror, I see my purple nose. The more I see it, the more ordinary it becomes. Eventually, someone is going to ask me what colour my nose is, and I'm gonna tell them it's purple.

If I put a sticky note on my wall telling me that I'm beautiful, and I see it all the time, I'm going to begin to believe it. It becomes a truth. It's really easy to reinforce something and trick your mind into believing in something. I put self-love stickies on the wall above my bed, telling me wonderful things.

Do you believe in reinforcement? Thinking that my nose is purple is me encouraging myself to believe that my nose is purple. Reinforcement is when you encourage a specific behaviour, in hopes that it will happen.

One of the easiest ways to get positive reinforcement is from your support system. They should have no problem telling you good things. Remember that they won't always be around all the time, so try to seek reinforcement in yourself. I do personally tell myself things over and over if I want to believe them. It was also how I studied when I was in school. The material eventually becomes something I know and a reality for me.

Fake it until you make it is SO true. It works. Use that motto in your life.

Treat Yo Self!

Don't be afraid to tell yourself that you love you! Treat yourself to spa days, or bubble baths, or yummy treats. Reward yourself for meeting your goals and showing good behaviour.

Invest your time in the things that you love. As long as the things that you want aren't dangerous, they should be worth pursuing. If you have extra money and time, spend it on taking a dance class if you love dancing, or take yourself out to dinner every once in a while. Don't be afraid to do things by yourself, it's good for you!

Pay attention to your needs.

Do whatever helps you, regardless of what other people might say. If listening to a certain song or watching a certain movie helps you get through a tough time, play that song or movie! If it will help to make you happy, it is worth it.

Sometimes it helps to make a list of things that help you. Maybe you can make a list of things others can say to help you when you're feeling down, or phone numbers of people to call when you need them, or create a playlist of those songs you like.

Treat yourself like you would treat someone else - you would do whatever you could to make them feel comfortable. Meet your own needs and tell your support team what they can do to help you. If they love you, they will be willing to listen and try to help if they can.

Some things that you could think about are safe words and tones, and triggers. Certain words and topics bother me, so it is my responsibility to communicate to my family and friends what those are. It's also good to make a 'no yelling' rule if yelling bothers you.

Always pay attention to what you want. Take the time to sit down with yourself and ask yourself things like:

• What makes me uncomfortable?
• What makes me feel safe and comfortable?
• What can I do to make myself feel better?

You should be the most important person to you. You're worth it.