How to Deal with Change and Depression

Change. It's a beautiful thing. Though I wished I’d believed this before, I’m glad I didn’t. Change allows us room to grow, experience life, go through drastic, and everyday adjustments.

As a wide eyed fifth grader, I wasn’t prepared to leave my friends and family behind; I wasn’t prepared to accept change. Moving from the loud, fast paced city in New Jersey, to the quiet suburbs of St. Louis was a life-altering shift that helped define the person that I am today. As I grew older and into my teenage years, I began to feel a sense of isolation. Things were confusing, my body was changing, my mind was thrown into disorder and I was entering high school with no sense of self. Trying to maneuver through life and find yourself in a world with no distinct identity had proven to be one of the hardest things I have had to do in all my seventeen years on earth.

Growing older has made me realize how important family is, I’ve always been close with them. I think that’s where my sense of isolation came from. I felt stuck in a state that I could no longer benefit from. I didn’t feel that I could grow and prosper in Missouri and deal with the nonsense that came with being a teenager. I no longer welcomed this change of scenery, I resented it. I allowed the pressures of life to get the best of me but what followed was not, in fact, a pity party, but a success story. A happy tragedy if you will.

I fell into a depression, an anxiety and lonesome fueled depression. I wasn’t sure how to cope or function or live and I let life take me by the strings and throw me around like a puppet. I knew something was wrong once I’d lost interest in all the things that made me great. It was when I’d stopped caring about my appearance and I’d determined that my life would always be full of misery and nothing else that I landed myself in the hospital. It was then that I knew it was time for the thing I resented most, change. If I didn’t accept defeat and vow to accept change, I would’ve been at rock bottom, I was already close.

Accepting that life has hurdles and road blocks was the best executive decision I could've made. I was putting myself in charge of my life, no longer letting other people be the ones tugging at my puppet strings. I decided that I needed to be able to flourish and prosper in any place, no matter where I live. Through all the trials and tribulations life has put me through thus far, I’m glad to say that I now appreciate change.

Being able to surpass the negatives and appreciate the positives has, and will continue to make me stronger both mentally and emotionally. I’m able to withstand the once dreaded factors of change and alterations to my life and not allow myself to break. Change. It is a beautiful thing. Though I wish I believed this before, I’m so glad I didn’t.

A Note from Me, Bri:

I’ve learned so much about myself and am oddly grateful to have faced such a life altering situation. Depression is an illness, yes. But it does not define you. It does not control your future nor does it shake your fate. It’s weakening yet strengthening in so many ways and know that you are not alone in any of it. When this particular subject is being spoken on, it’s perceived as attention seeking which, in turn, discourages people who are truly suffering from making their very valid emotions known. You are not alone. If no one will listen, I will. Thank you for sharing your time with me and I hope that you will continue to thrive and prosper. Subscribe!