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How to boost your self-esteem in 5 simple steps

Are you your own worst critic? Here are 5 ways to start improving your self-esteem today!

By Jerrell JohnPublished about a year ago Updated about a year ago 7 min read
Top Story - October 2022
How to boost your self-esteem in 5 simple steps
Photo by Pawel Czerwinski on Unsplash

Many of us have felt at one point or another that we are our worst critics. It’s a normal feeling, Realistically, there’s a plethora of different reasons why this might be the case, so I’d be lying if I said the solution was easy; however, that doesn’t mean it isn’t simple.

I can understand how it might feel like you’re stuck in a never-ending cycle of self-criticism. It’s hard to break out of that mindset, but I promise you it is possible.

Here are five ways you can start to obtain good self-esteem and reduce negative self-talk today!

What Is Self-Esteem and Why Is It Important to Pay Attention To?

Everyone has different experiences with their self-esteem and thus has varying levels of understanding. To give you a better understanding, self-esteem can be defined as how we assess and view ourselves.

Sometimes we may feel that we’re not good enough, and no matter what we do, it’s never quite adequate. Everyone else seems to be doing better than us, which only strengthens these feelings. This is because, when making decisions, people usually follow habitual judgmental patterns rather than evidence.

If this feeling resonates with you and you don’t want it to worsen over time, know that change is possible.

Have you ever had that one good friend who is always confident, no matter what? They’ll tell us we can do anything and make jokes about everything.

And then there are the other people with low self-esteem issues -they’re usually not as vocal about their concerns for fear of being thought less worthy or capable than everyone else around them. (Even though maybe sometimes those worries might be legitimate.)

The difference between these two types could largely depend upon how often each individual feels ignored by others when it matters most; this is especially true for close relationships…

Some might also think of this as self-confidence, but, to me, self-confidence is more so one’s trust in themselves and their ability to tackle challenges, problem solve, and successfully conduct themselves within the world.

By Lena Mytchyk on Unsplash

The importance of self-esteem can’t be overstated. When you accept yourself for who you are, with some healthy criticism, it opens up opportunities in all aspects of your lives: success rates rise; relationships become more manageable–and even happy!

Opposed to hanging onto old wounds from childhood by scorning them openly every day because they don’t live up to your own standards or expectations.

A person’s worth doesn’t just come down solely on how successful they might seem but also on what kind of attitude they carry themselves with, whether it’s accepting responsibility when something goes wrong instead of blaming others around them

What Are the Effects of Low/ Poor Self-Esteem, And What Can Lower It?

We all have bad days, but if you’re struggling with self-esteem and feeling like your confidence is low — don’t worry! It might be hard to recognize when it’s happening because we are so good at convincing ourselves that everything is fine. Some common approaches different people take include:

Living with constant dissatisfaction about not feeling good enough, blaming others for their failures or inabilities, and typically reluctant to accept praise from anyone because it could be seen as an effort put forth on behalf of someone else who isn’t doing anything wrong — like maybe if you were adorable then people would see through all the lies and start treating YOU special!?

Some people purposefully take on a happy and successful image but are terrified of failure. They are constantly surrounded by a swarm of doubts and need reassurance from others on how they look, act, or speak to feel successful inside their skin!

Finally, some people have evidence from past experiences about how useless and helpless they’ve been, so they use self-pity as the best way for people to feel sorry for them and come to their rescue rather than take responsibility for their own lives.

They believe that change is impossible because of evidence from past experiences. However, this thought process merely shields them from fear instead of pushing them toward growth.

The consequences of such lower self-esteem approaches could be devastating, to say the least. It can create stress, anxiety, and loneliness, and the likelihood of depression increases far greater than the fear that they are running away from in the first place.

Typically, this could lead to increased drug and alcohol abuse vulnerability, especially in adolescence. Worst of all, these consequences reinforce the low self-esteem they already had to begin with and can take a person into a downward spiral and even actively cause self-destructive behavior.

By Miguel Bruna on Unsplash

5 Ways to Obtain Healthy Self-Esteem.

1. Take on Challenges

The first important step is confronting difficult situations and trying new things. Taking on new challenges opens us to failure and success, which can be positive on both spectrums.

If you fail, you can, at the very least, be happy that you accepted the challenge and now see an area in your life you can focus on improving.

Then rather than becoming less fearful of failure, you’ll become braver due to your perspective shift.

2. Identify the Positives About Yourself.

Sit down with a piece of paper and write three positive things you admire about yourself. Of course, ensure you’re being truthful, or else that little voice in your head will quickly critique you.

If this feels difficult or even impossible at the moment, try asking a close friend or relative what they admire about you and write it down.

You might be able to expand on their points now that they might’ve given you a perspective you didn’t consider.

3. Take Action on the Things You Don’t Like About Yourself.

This method might work well alongside or even more effectively than the previous one.

Please sit down and write three things you dislike about yourself or apparent shortcomings you believe you have and write down what you’re going to do to improve or change them.

4. Eliminate Self-Criticism and Introduce Self-Compassion.

Learn how to introduce self-compassion in your daily life because even healthy self-criticism on its own can only get you so far. Here’s a link that can help you develop self-compassion in five simple steps.

5. Let Go of Negative People.

Typically, people with low self-esteem revolve around like-minded people.

Hopefully, by now, it’s clear to see, but they probably aren’t helping you towards your goal of having high self-esteem, and I’d argue that letting go of them might feel more relieving than you think right now.

The Bottom Line

We all want self-esteem, but it’s also something many of us struggle with. The five ways to obtain higher self-esteem mentioned in the article are just a few examples.

If you’re struggling with low self-esteem, don’t be afraid to reach out for help. Many people are happy to support you on your journey to a healthier self-image.

Imagine a place where you can be kind to yourself.

Where your inner critic doesn’t have any room and always stays out on the patio, enjoying herself with friends instead of being inside your head, making us feel bad about ourselves all day long!

And trust me when I say that many people want nothing more than this voice in their lives to be gone forever–you need some time away from it before they’ll let go entirely, so don’t give up hope yet…

Every day, try to do one act of self-compassion. It can be as simple as making yourself a cup of tea or calling your best friend or family member instead of dwelling on a negative thought.

Over time, these little things will add up and make a big difference in your positive thoughts and treat yourself, which will bring a sense of accomplishment and a sense of self-worth!


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About the Creator

Jerrell John

A visionary constructing his life purpose as an Author/Educator by building an impactful personal brand (& documenting the process).

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Comments (5)

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  • Kent Brindleyabout a year ago

    Thank you for sharing this. Self-Esteem and its neighbor, Self-Confidence, may always be my struggles; but I'm willing to work at them...

  • Alex H Mittelman about a year ago

    I feel better already!

  • Angelina F. Thomasabout a year ago

    Total excellence! Keep up the great work. Please & thank you.

  • Amy Hallabout a year ago

    Subscribed! Loved! Please consider reading mine I'm just getting started subscribe if you'd like! Self esteem is so important and so lost

  • KJ Aartilaabout a year ago

    Excellent, well-written and informative article. Thank you for sharing it! I like that you point out "It's not easy, but is simple." 😄

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