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Game-Changing Speechmaking

by Lese Dunton 6 months ago in self help
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Reframing Fear

Toastmasters, Toastmasters, Toastmasters. That’s what my brother advised when I told him I was scared to make speeches. I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life trying to avoid standing in front of people and communicating. Even if I were able to successfully dodge their requests, I feared the inevitable day when group pressure, as in everyone yelling “Speech! Speech!,” would force me into compliance.

So I paid $65 and went to Toastmasters, which featured a group of warmly encouraging people who smiled and clapped a lot. When my appointed day arrived, I walked up to the head of the table and stood in front of a small podium to actually speak my carefully prepared speech, as well as to enunciate, and let’s not forget being loud enough for everyone to hear. The script wasn’t bad. It’s even possible that people might like it. My main concern was weak and wobbly knees. Just walking up there turned my legs into rubber. Could I remain standing for the duration? I wanted to say, “I’m so sorry. I just need to sit down now,” but that is not considered good speechmaking. Also, my heart was beating way too fast. Would it burst out of my chest before I could finish?

I began to hear words coming out of my mouth. They were slow and steady as a way to stay centered, which made my delivery seem deadpan and understated. I opened by saying, “Some people love making speeches and they can’t wait to get into the spotlight. That’s good, they should do that.” From the back of the room, I heard the most beautiful sound in the world from a single laugh. I hadn’t thought of that before. Of course. Humor as relaxation. My whole body started smiling. I could do this.

Afterwards, during the feedback session, someone gave me one of the best compliments of my life: “You remind me of Bob Newhart.” These words reframed my approach to handling all fear. Just be a deadpan comedian if possible.

Years later, still bolstered by my Toastmasters success, I was asked to speak about a cable television show I wrote and produced that hardly anyone watched. The purpose was to tell the audience the secrets of success. Piece of cake. As long as there’s a microphone involved and a podium I can lean on, I’ll be fine. I would much prefer to remain seated while talking but no one ever asks for that.

At first, everything seemed fine. Mild jitters walking up to the stage gave way to diving into a grand explanation of my creation and what inspired me as an artist. They were actually listening. After a while, I leaned on the podium for strength, as my knees were beginning to weaken. Much to my horror, the podium had wheels and could not be leaned on. This can’t be happening! A devastating turn of events. How could I possibly rely on just myself?

The moderator asked, “Are there any more questions?” I prayed with all my might, “Please dear God, no more questions.” I was ready to announce the dreaded, “I’m sorry. I just need to sit down now,” but thankfully no one raised another hand and I heard the blissful sound of applause. All I had to do was smile and nod and return to my solid chair. Finally back in the seated position, I savored one of my favorite feelings in life: relief. The next speaker had now become the center of attention.

I learned a lot that day. For example, don’t get over confident. Keep practicing and respect the process. It’s an excellent opportunity for growth every time. Even Stephen Colbert said he gets a little nervous each night before going on camera. John Lennon would sometimes throw up before going on stage. Let’s not even think about that.

I also learned not to forget humor. I could have made a joke about the podium-on-wheels situation, like rolling it from side to side while saying, “I need to lean on this this thing while talking, but it just won’t stand still. I’m not sure I can keep going without it.” It may have caused a laugh, and that would be all I needed to carry on.

They say it’s important to focus on making the audience feel comfortable rather than always thinking about yourself. I need to remember that too.

My advice for any speechmaker is to open strong, talk loud enough, and close with a bang. It can change your life. Just make sure the podium doesn’t have wheels.

self help

About the author

Lese Dunton

Reporter, author, essayist. Likes writing about children, dogs, love, and everything in life.

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