Follow Your Bliss

I close my eyes and just breathe. The air never tastes clean in Las Vegas, most of the city smells like a mixture of piss and melting asphalt. In these early mornings, though, the air almost feels cleaner. Before the relentless sun bakes everything and you can feel the pollution as a layer of grime on your skin. I let the noise of the city fade, focusing my awareness into my body. The sun warms my skin. A light breeze caresses me. Dancing across my face, weaving through my eyelashes in playful wonder. I anchor into this peaceful moment. To the sensations. To the emotions. To the elements. I let them all flow through me, become me. I absorb their ecstatic joy, let it fill me. I am one with everything. Just one single thread in an endless tapestry. I can feel the heartbeat of the Earth herself, beating in tandem with mine. Whispering to me.

It is time, child. It is time to open your heart. Let it all spill out. Sing, my child, sing.

I take one more breath and slowly open my eyes and allow the bustle of Freemont Street to fill in the empty spaces in my mind. I set down my guitar case, and get comfortable. The light hits this spot so beautifully this time of morning. I smile at the sun as I strum my guitar and make a few quick adjustments. There is a pressure building inside me, a hurricane forming just off the coast. As I hit the first few cords, all of this energy flowing into me needs an outlet. Inhale one last full breath. My fingers are dancing across the strings to the rhythm of my soul. Closing my eyes, I see the world is drenched in liquid gold. The beauty takes my breath away, and all at once, my heart bursts wide open. All of the love, all of the sadness. The hope and despair, pouring out with the first word. The only thing I can do is sing. So, I sing, rising higher and higher. I am no longer here. I am nowhere. I am no one, and it is so beautiful.

When I come out of my trance hours later, the sun is high over my head. I’m always a bit shaky after I go so deep into my heart space. My arms have a slight shivery feeling and my fingers cramp. I reach for my water bottle, only to find it empty. It’s time to get in off the streets, I can already see the heat waves reaching wispy fingers towards the sky. Glancing at my guitar case, it appears I made a decent amount in tips today. I start gathering and counting the bills when I notice a black Moleskin notebook. My heart flutters oddly as I pick it up. I glance around quickly, but nothing stands out. Throngs of people stroll about their way, oblivious to 90% of their surroundings. I turn my attention back to the notebook in my hand. Running my hand across the cover, I open it slowly. My breath catches in my throat as I see the letter written on the first page. My heart racing as I start to read.

Dearest Songbird,

I don’t know your name, but from the first time I heard you sing that was the name I gave you. My name is Adam. Three and a half years ago, I lost my wife to suicide. She suffered from bipolar depression and alcoholism. She was the most beautiful woman in the world to me, but she carried this deep sadness within her. I thought if I loved her hard enough, she would see herself clearly. I suppose I thought I could save her. It has taken me all this time to realize that we all have to save ourselves. But at that point, I was adrift in a sea of despair. Wandering around the city, thinking about ending it all. When out of nowhere, the most beautiful voice opened up and pulled me in. You sang about the darkness within, about wanting to give in and be consumed. Tears streaked down my face as I listened to you give life to the turmoil inside me. You sang your pain so exquisitely. Underneath, though, there was one element woven into the very foundation of every song. Hope. Your ability to never lose hope in the shadow of so much pain, is something rare and beautiful. I have come here every day since to listen to you sing. Every single day you came, and so did I. You can never understand the impact you have had on me. Your music has been a lifeboat and an inspiration to me. A beautiful gift that the whole world should experience. I recently came into quite a bit of inheritance and have decided to follow my dream and move to New Zealand. I leave tomorrow, I hope that I will be hearing your music live in concert one day soon. Sometimes all we need is a hand up I would like you to use this $20,000 to share your music with the world. Follow your bliss, for you have inspired me to follow mine.

With the deepest love and gratitude,

Adam

My hands are shaking and tears are streaming down my face as I stare at the cashiers check for $20,000. I am so overcome with emotion that I feel I might combust. Closing my eyes, I turn my face to the sun and whisper a quiet thank you for this gift. To Adam, wherever he is. To the universe for aligning this for me. I have been saving for almost 4 years to pay for studio time to record some of my songs for a demo, but something always comes up. I’m laughing and crying as I realize I can start recording tomorrow. Gratitude fills every inch of my body, and I feel light as a feather as I pack up my guitar. Follow my bliss, indeed.