Dear Celeste

Dear Celeste,

2020 wasn't such a horrible year. You got that promotion you've been working towards. You and your boyfriend made the huge commitment and bought a house together. You witnessed the death and birth of yourself, and you suffered the hard loss of your grandpa.

There is always a balance of good and bad. And no matter how tough it got for you, whether it was rude people at work, bad mental health days, or the damn washing machine that kept breaking down on you no matter how much time and effort you spent trying to fix it, you did it. You survived another year.

I'm proud of you. I know it wasn't easy asking for help when you finally noticed how bad your anger was getting. I know it wasn't easy seeing your parents for the first time in almost 5 years when your grandpa died. And I know it wasn't easy just existing. But you took it one day at a time, you started taking the medication you needed and you finally got up the courage to lose the weight. Reward yourself for dragging yourself out of the darkness into the light, it's never a easy journey.

Unfortunately, 2021 already started off on the wrong foot. Your aunt died on New Years morning after being hospitalized for months. You weren’t close to her by any means but regardless, she was family. And even though you won’t mourn her the same way as everyone else, you’ll know to be there for your family, especially since she came from your grandpas side where most of the hurt will be. You’ve always known this, but family is just as important than everything else sometimes. I think with the loss of your grandfather and now your aunt, more then ever are you cherishing your personal relationships and reminding the ones you love how much they mean to you.

I know death can be a huge event to deal with, but you are making some exciting changes this year for you. You've got that other promotion that you are working towards and you've made the huge decision to go back to school to become a nurse. You’ll struggle, want to give up and quit but remember the reasons why you are doing this. Always remind yourself of who you are and why you want this.

Now I know you don't believe in writing down resolutions for the new year, but I would encourage you to write anything and everything down. Small goals, big goals, long-term goals, short-term goals. Write down your feelings, your fantasies, YOUR story. I think you would be surprised how much good it will do for you when you write it all down on paper and can look back at it.

Here are a few for suggestions:

1) Read a book for 30 minutes a day

2) Get in a workout everyday no matter what

3) Spend quality time with those that you love

4) Ask for help when you need it

5) Cook at home more often

It seems as if you are already doing some of these, but lets make them into a routine. I know how easy it is for you to slide back down into that dark hole and how hard it is to get back out of it. You will have to push yourself harder this year if you want to succeed. You are a strong woman with strong women in your life, learn by their example and their wisdom.

Well Celeste, I think that covers most of what I wanted to tell you. Always remember, you have a huge support system and a number of people that love you.

This too shall pass.

Love,

Celeste