Connection lost

It is now the second month of 2021. Where are we now? It was around this time last year when the response to covid 19 started to become more serious. None of us thought we would still be here today. There was an immense amount of hope that after a few weeks, or maybe months, it would be behind us. I can't even begin to describe the pains people have experienced socially, economically, health wise... None of this is funny, or how we want things to be in the future. None of us, art first, thought it would last this long.

We live in a time where it is easier to "connect" without being in person. I can't count how many hours I have spent on different online platforms for either business or social purposes. Yet, while all these options are available, how do we really feel? Do we feel connected? To be honest, it is really not the same. We don't have to pretend it is. I guess, I am thinking about the extra effort that has to go into making human connections with online platforms. Here is what I mean. When we gather in person, there is a natural "set up" for a connection. You actually have to work for it otherwise. You have to choose to call the friend, and not just interact because you are at the same place at the same time. For some people, it may not be odd to use a virtual platform to keep up with people. Maybe for some it isn't easy and certainly does not make sense.

I would almost say you have to work harder at participation online then offline. Being that using these platforms means being more purposeful in our participation, is that why so many are tired? For instance, how many times do we choose to have the camera off on an online call? Do we sometimes feel an online event is a vain effort to the real thing, so we don't even bother? Is it more tiring to have to use the kind of intention that being online demands? Is that why for some the days are mixing? Is this time teaching us that many of us had far more social hurts than we realized? I wonder what lessons we will come out learning. Is this time teaching us that some of us took for granted the casualness of going where we want when we want, at our best interest? When we come to the end of this, will we have to work together as a society to "de-virtualize" after all this time of having to do things differently? Will the struggle of social anxiety be greater? Here is my suggestion. Maybe, if we work at building our intentionality and honesty about our experiences with each other, we can come out of this learning something about our shared human experience. What that is, I don't know yet.

Here are some things I try to do to keep up a sense of intentionality.

1. Try to keep the camera on in the zoom call.

2. Send someone a note of some kind letting them know you are thinking of them. We all feel somewhat isolated these days.

3. Begin to define what you have personal control over, what you don't, and learn to be comfortable with those things and how to handle them.

4. The people you used to see all the time at work, church, social functions, (or whatever activities you are apart of ) aren't all just up and gone. Check in on them if you miss them. Don't be afraid to initiate.

5. Take advantage of what is available to you. Go for a walk, get fresh air. Visit a friend or two if you can. Don't fully digitize your life.

Don't feel bad about taking care of yourself.

1. Cultivate hope by searching for positive information, and uplifting involvements. Cling to Faith.

2. Choose someone to be honest with when the above is lacking.

3. Say no to commitments that overwhelm where you are at.

4. Say yes to involvements, and relationships that are life giving.

Maybe life didn't change much for you with covid. Maybe this doesn't feel weird to you. I think the difference now maybe that this all may feel like a forced change, rather than willingly choosing it. Now more than ever is a good time for us to support each other through the mess of our experiences.

We are all in this together.

-NLorrenC